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Acts of Worship

O Allah, I Love You Even Though I Disobey You | Khutbah

September 23, 2022Dr. Omar Suleiman

While some of the pious predecessors were passing away, they made a prayer to the effect of “O Allah, I love you even though I disobey you.” In this khutbah, Dr. Omar Suleiman discusses whether it is possible to really love Allah and disobey Him at the same time? And if it is possible, what are the limits to that disobedience?

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Transcript

This transcript was auto-generated using AI and may contain misspellings.
We begin by praising Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala and bearing witness that none has the right to be worshipped or unconditionally obeyed except for him. And we bear witness that Muhammad sallallahu alayhi wa sallam is his final messenger. We ask Allah to send his peace and blessings upon him, the prophets and messengers that came before him, his family and companions that served alongside him and those that follow in his blessed path until the day of judgment. And we ask Allah to make us amongst them. Allahumma ameen. Dear brothers and sisters, last week as we spoke about this concept of husn adhan in Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, expecting good from Allah, even as you fear your sins, we talked about how it's actually important to embrace that tension that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam mentioned, arjullah, that I hope the best from Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, and I at the same time fear my sins. I fear the effect of my sins. And subhanAllah, you see that one of the beauties of taskiya, one of the beauties of spirituality as it's defined in Islam, is that it doesn't leave these concepts open-ended for the mind to define it, for our hawwa, for our desires to define it as we see fit. Husn adhan in Allah, I expect well from Allah, I love Allah, therefore I'm good. I have no obligations upon me, no one can tell me that what I'm doing is wrong, I have nothing to worry about because I love Allah and I expect well from Allah. I know in my heart that he's going to forgive me. You can't do that. There is a, there is an obligation, there is a structure, a framework for husn adhan in Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, for expecting good in Allah, and as we said, that is when you are doing good that you expect good from Allah. So after your sin, when you are repenting, you expect Allah's forgiveness. When you're in hardship and you make dua, you expect Allah's answer to your dua. And after you seek to remedy yourself of those sins, you expect Allah's forgiveness, and you expect his Jannah, and you wish for the best from him as you are doing the best that you possibly can do.
Now when it comes to the concept of loving Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, it's a heavy claim. And I came across something from Amr bin As, may Allah be pleased with him, that's narrated to him, and is narrated to several people as they were passing away from the Salaf, from the pious predecessors, and it sparks an interesting discussion. In his last moments as he's passing away, his final dua, he says, اللهم إني أحبك وإن كنت أعصيك Oh Allah, you know that I love you. I love you even though I used to disobey you. ولست عزيزا فأنتصر ولا بريئا فأعتذر I'm not in any position of strength to support anyone else or help anyone else. I'm not innocent to seek forgiveness on behalf of someone else. I am completely in need of you in these moments, and I know that I love you. And so as he makes this admission, I love you even though I disobeyed you. ولكنني أشهد أن لا إله إلا أنت وحدك لا شريك لك وأن محمد عبدك ورسولك I bear witness that you are one, and that you have no partner, and that Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم is your slave and your messenger. This beautiful statement that is attributed to him, and as we'll see many others, actually brings forth a very interesting moment of introspection that a striving person would have even as they are leaving this world. Now when we talk about the love of Allah سبحانه وتعالى, it is connected constantly, and in fact we've had khutbas about it, constantly to the obedience of Allah. So just as حسن الظن in Allah, expecting good from Allah, is connected to doing good for Allah, do you love Allah is connected to do you obey Allah سبحانه وتعالى. It's throughout the Quran and throughout the Sunnah and throughout the statements of the Salaf. In fact we find حسن البصري رحمه الله
said زعم قوم أنهم يحبون الله that a group of people made the claim that we love Allah. فَبَتَ لَهُم بِهَٰذِي الْآيَةِ So Allah tested them with a verse. وَإِن كُنْتُمْ تُحِبُّونَ اللَّهَ فَاتَّبِعُونِي يُحْبِبُكُمُ اللَّهُ Say that if you truly love Allah, then follow the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم and Allah will love you back. A claim was made, how do you weigh the claim? By your obedience to the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم, which is of course obedience to Allah. إِنَّ الْمُحِبَّ لِمَنْ يُحِبُّ مُطِيعُ The one who loves obeys the one that they love. This is the basic definition of love of Allah سبحانه وتعالى. And how to earn the love of Allah سبحانه وتعالى in return. But there is one issue that needs to be discussed, which is we all disobey Allah at times. We all have moments of distance from Allah سبحانه وتعالى. We all commit sins. So what does that mean and how do we weigh this concept of loving Allah, which is the weightiest claim. And by the way, the greatest testimony to the sweetness of faith. The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said, the greatest sign of someone who tastes the sweetness of faith is what? That they love Allah and His Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم more than anything else. And so that love of Allah is not just something of the heart, a matter of the heart. It's a claim that has serious implications and is the greatest testimony to whether or not you're tasting the sweetness of faith. So when you have a direct correlation between love and obedience and also the fact that we all disobey Allah, the question becomes to what extent do we disobey Allah? How much do we disobey Allah? And at what point in our disobedience of Allah can we no longer even make the claim that we love Allah سبحانه وتعالى. And you have this narration that you start with, where the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم is dealing with a generation that includes the likes of Abu Bakr الصديق رضي الله عنه, and Umar رضي الله عنه, and Uthman رضي الله عنه, and Ali رضي الله عنه.
And also includes the likes of people that were really, really struggling with this new religion. That were really struggling to change their lives in accordance with this new system. And in this very popular narration, a man comes to the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم, or rather is brought to the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم as a recovering alcoholic, or as someone who cannot beat his alcohol addiction. He constantly keeps on returning to his alcohol over and over and over again. And someone says as he's being brought forward, اللهم لعنه ما أكثر ما يؤتى به. Oh Allah curse him. How often we have to bring this man to you, Ya Rasulullah. What a shame. What a loser. What a nobody. He can't stop drinking alcohol and he lives in the time of the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم. What does the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم respond with? He says صلى الله عليه وسلم لا تلعنوه فوالله ما علمت إنه يحب الله ورسوله. Don't curse him because I know that he loves Allah and his messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم. I know he loves Allah and his messenger. In that man's heart you can't see it with the exterior of the alcohol. This does not justify the sin of drinking alcohol, nor does it belittle its severity. A person's prayer would not be accepted when they're in that state. But in that heart there is something. He does have the love of Allah and his messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم. And the hope is not just that it would save him in the hereafter, but that eventually that love of Allah and the messenger that certainly dwindles and diminishes every time he gets drunk again will overtake that sin and will become his dominant feature. The love of Allah and his messenger. And that indeed became the dominant feature of that man. To hear the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم say about you, when you're in your lowest point, I know you love Allah and the messenger. What about us when we're in our lowest point, when we feel our greatest distance from Allah,
and Allah صلى الله عليه وسلم still believes, or still, I'm sorry, gives you the opportunity to come back to him, and still has joy when you make tawbah to him صلى الله عليه وسلم. So I know he loves Allah and his messenger, but he's stuck right now. And there is a connection between the sin that he's committing right now and the state of his faith, as the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said in another authentic hadith, لا يزني الزاني حين يزني وهو مؤمن. ولا يشرب الخمر حين يشرب وهو مؤمن. ولا يسرق حين يسرق وهو مؤمن. The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said, an adulterer does not commit adultery while he is a believer. And a person does not drink alcohol at the time that they're drinking alcohol while they are a believer. And a person does not steal at the time of their stealing while they are a believer. And in other narrations, the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said, and he does not kill while he's killing, while he's a believer. Of course, these are major sins. But in that moment that you're doing that type of stuff, are you a kafir? No. We don't make takfir of people. We don't say you're a disbeliever. Of course, unless you make these things halal, unless you actually claim that they're permitted. But the belief is not present with you in those moments. There is a severe deficiency. Abu Huraira رضي الله عنه was the narrator of the hadith, explains it's like you're taking the thawb of iman, the thawb of belief, and you're putting it on a rack while you commit those deeds. SubhanAllah, it's a powerful analogy. Ibn Abbas رضي الله عنه said that, this is you and your faith. And when you're committing those sins, it's like this. And when you return back to your faith, it's like this again. So it's like you're intentionally taking off that iman, taking away your better senses, taking away your belief, and you're putting it on the rack for some time, while you commit this sin. And then trying to put it back on. But eventually it stops fitting the right way. Because every time you commit that sin,
you distance yourself from Allah سبحانه وتعالى a little bit more. And so the idea here is that, while you claim to love Allah سبحانه وتعالى, when you indulge these sins, you can't say that in this moment, I am in a state of love of Allah. So the Prophet ﷺ is saying that a person could indeed be in one of these states, and there's still something in there to be redeemed, to be salvaged. Now what does this mean for us? What does this mean for someone who's like, well, he's talking about the alcoholics and the adulterers, he's talking about this person and that person, and I don't fit into any of these categories. Even the most righteous people from this ummah would wonder, where am I with this love of Allah سبحانه وتعالى? Muhammad ibn Wasi' رحمه الله تعالى, a man came to him, a great scholar, he said, إني أحبك, I love you for the sake of Allah. قال أحبك الذي أحببتني فيه. May the one who you love me for love you back. ثم حول وجهه. Then he turned his face and he started to cry. And he said, اللهم إني أعوذ بك أن أحب لك وأنت لي مبغل. Oh Allah, I seek refuge in you from being loved for your sake while you're angry with me. Someone loves me for Allah, and Allah is upset with me, Allah is angry with me because of some sin that I'm committing and putting a distance between myself and Allah سبحانه وتعالى. So the alcoholic and the person who's that far away has to have hope that there is something in there, indeed a true expression of Allah's love that's dwindling, but it needs to be redeemed. And the one who's in a state of worship and scholarship has to be so worried about losing the love of Allah سبحانه وتعالى that drives them so that when they pass away, they could be like Hudaitha ibn al-Yaman رضي الله تعالى عنه who looks to Allah سبحانه وتعالى in the last moments of his life and he says هذه آخر ساعة من الدنيا, this is the last hour of my life.
اللهم إنك تعلم أني أحبك فبارك لي في لقائك. Oh Allah, you know that I love you. You know that I love you. So bless me in this meeting with you. Could you say that at the time of your death? If death was coming to you today, would you be able to say, Oh Allah, you know that I love you. You know that I love you. So bless this meeting that I'm about to have with you, the inevitable meeting that I'm about to have with you. What does this mean for us practically dear brothers and sisters when I'm thinking about the love of Allah and do I love Allah سبحانه وتعالى even though I disobey Him? I want you to take a moment and to think about the intentional sins that we commit. Put the size of the sins on the side. You know, we usually talk about إنما الأعمال بالنيات that verily actions are by intentions when we're talking about the good deeds. But there's a difference between that intentional repeated sin. The sin that you wake up to every single day, the sin that you have accepted as a natural part of your life, the sin that you do with intentionality and with consistency. And then you still claim to love Allah سبحانه وتعالى. There's a problem with that. The scholars differentiate between the sins of the lover of Allah and the sins of the one who transgresses the limits of Allah سبحانه وتعالى. The sins of the lover of Allah are slip-ups. They're mistakes. They're things that happen along the way. And a person wakes up when they fall into those sins and even sometimes the major sins happen. May Allah protect us from them. But we see this with the Prophet ﷺ talking about this man and that person that might have fallen into that and never thought they'd fall into that major sin. There's still a chance for you. That doesn't mean you didn't love Allah سبحانه وتعالى. That means you really felt bad.
But it doesn't mean that you didn't love Allah سبحانه وتعالى. But the sins of the lover are slip-ups. The sins of the lover of Allah سبحانه وتعالى, they happen less frequently and without intentionality. You get caught in a moment, caught by an environment. Your desire takes you somewhere that it shouldn't have taken you. But you come back to Allah سبحانه وتعالى in sincere repentance. The intentional sins, the intentional forms of disobedience, the ones that are conscious choices that you make, even if they're small, even if they're small. As Imam al-Ghazali رحمه الله said, imagine taking a rock and dripping a drop of water on it every single day in the same spot. It doesn't matter how strong the stone is, you'll destroy the rock. Even if they're small, the repeated recurring ones, they kill the heart. And when you kill the heart, you kill the ability of the heart to love Allah سبحانه وتعالى. And that's why you find the scholars emphasizing the recurring nature of sins, the accepted sins, the sins that I'm no longer telling myself are even a problem anymore. Because I'm telling myself that, well, Allah سبحانه وتعالى surely still loves me and I'm still okay. Dear brother or sister, don't ignore your Lord. Don't ignore Allah سبحانه وتعالى. Don't accept these things as a daily part of your life that you can go back to over and over and over again and keep asking Allah to protect you. Keep asking Allah to protect you from any of these sins, the minor ones or the major ones, and especially the intentional ones, the recurring ones. And how do we get to this place where we're asking Allah سبحانه وتعالى, Ya Allah, I love you even though I disobey you. Subhanallah, the most powerful narration, and there are about five of them, but for the sake of time, the most powerful narration I came across in this regard
was Ibn Samak رحمه الله تعالى. When Ibn Samak was passing away, قَالَ اللَّهُمَّ إِنَّكَ تَعْلَمُ أَنِّي كُنْتُ إِذْ كُنْتُ أَعْصِيكَ أُحِبُّ أَنْ أَكُونَ مِمَّن يُطِيعُكَ Oh Allah, you know that when I used to disobey you, when I used to disobey you, that I hoped and I loved to be amongst those that obey you. That I don't want to be amongst those that disobey you. When I find myself in the state of disobedience, I'm not proud of it, I'm not okay with it, I'm not complacent with it. And I want to be from those that obey you. And in one narration he said, أُحِبُّ مَن يُطِيعُكَ Even if I was amongst those that used to disobey you, I always loved those people that obeyed you. I always wanted to find myself in that category of people that obeyed you, in that category of people that loved you. And I'm asking you, Oh Allah, to make me amongst those people that love you and that are beloved to you. I'm asking you for that even though I know I'm going to slip up. And I'll do my part to wake up in the morning and to ask myself, is this sin worth this relationship with Allah? Not just is this sin worth hellfire or punishment. Is it worth distance from Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala? And then at night when I go to sleep and when I wake up and I make my prayer, Oh Allah, count me amongst those that love you sincerely and that are beloved to you. اللهم إنا نسألك حبك وحب من يحبك والعمل الذي يقربنا إلى حبك Oh Allah, we ask you for your love and the love of those that are beloved to you and the love of every deed that brings us closer to your love. اللهم آمين أقول قولي هذا واستغفر الله لي ولكم ورسالة المسلمين
وغفور الرحيم الحمد لله والصلاة والسلام على رسول الله وعلى آله وصحبه من ولاه ربنا لا تؤخذنا إن نسينا أو أخطأنا ربنا ولا تحمل علينا إسرًا كما حملته على الذين من قبلنا ربنا ولا تحملنا ما لا طاقة لنا به واعف عنا واخفر لنا وارحمنا أنت مولانا فانصرنا على القوم الكافرين عباد الله اللهم أمر بالعدل والإحسان وإيطاء ذي القربى وينهى عن الفحشاء والمنكر والبغي يعظكم لعلكم تذكرون فاذكروا الله يذكركم واشكروه وعلى نعمة يزد لكم وعلى ما تصنعون وقم بالصلاة
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