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Afterlife

Watch Your Mouth | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 16

March 15, 2025Dr. Omar Suleiman

You try to be mindful not to commit greater sins, but do you watch what you say? The words you speak, the posts you type, and every joke you make at someone’s expense don’t disappear when you do.

In the punishment of the grave, tongues that once spread lies, mocked others, and fueled gossip will now become a source of torment. Some will tear their own faces apart. Others will eat their own flesh. Meanwhile, those who guarded their words will soar, their tongues planting trees of reward in Jannah.

NOTE: All depictions of Barzakh are purely conceptual and only vocals were used in the making of the soundtrack.

Download discussion guides for "The Other Side": https://yqn.io/2e7585

Captioning provided by Muhsen.

References

  1. Abu Sulayman al-Makki narrated that a group of scholars mentioned: “We passed by a body of water between us and Basra when we heard the braying of a donkey. So we asked, ‘What is this braying?’ They replied, ‘There was a man among us who, whenever his mother spoke to him, would say to her, “Stop braying like a donkey!” After he died, the sound of braying was heard from his grave every night.’” [Ibn Abi ad-Dunya, Kitab al-Quboor; Ibn al-Qayyim, Kitab ar-Ruh]
  2. The Messenger of Allah ﷺ said: “Indeed, Allah detests the pretentiously eloquent man who wags his tongue like a cow does.” [Sunan Abi Dawud #5005; Jami’ at-Tirmidhi #2853]
  3. Amr ibn Dinar said: A man from Medina had a sister who fell ill, and he would visit her regularly to check on her. When she passed away, he prepared her for burial and carried her to her grave.

Transcript

This transcript was auto-generated using AI and may contain misspellings.
"Inna ankara al-aswati la sawtu al-hameer."The worst of voices is the braying of a donkey.Abu Sulayman al-Makki narrates about a group of scholars that said we passed some bodiesof water between us and Basra, and while we were traveling, we heard the strange brayingof a donkey.So we asked the people of that town, what is that noise, that braying of a donkey?And they replied that this was a man who used to live amongst us, and he used to be knownfor when his mother would speak to him, he would yell back at her and say, stop brayinglike a donkey.SubhanAllah, once he died, they would hear the braying of a donkey every single nightfrom his grave.I want you to think about all the ways people talk back to their parents, and how far we'vegotten from just saying, "uff," which would be enough to doom us.We forget that some of the greatest tyrants are those who are tyrants to their parents.And that's why with 'Isa (عليه السلام), Jesus, the son of Mary, when Allah subhanahuwa ta'ala mentions him speaking from the cradle, he says, "wabarram biwalidati, walamyaj'alni jabbaran shaqiya."SubhanAllah, "made me dutiful to my mother, and he has not made me a wretched tyrant."The thing is though, if you have a loose tongue, you'll eventually end up letting it loosein the worst of ways.The Prophet (ﷺ) said that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala hates "al-balighmin al-rijal."Allah hates the one who's excessive with their speech amongst men, who slaps his tongue aroundlike the cow slaps his tongue.So how did you get here?If you just took Surat al-Hujurat and you did a visualization of the grave through Surat
al-Hujurat, I want you to think about all the punishments and how they match.Allah 'azza wa jal says, "la yaskhar qawmun min qawm."Let not one group of you mock another group of you.So it starts with this, thinking that you're better than people, and then using your tongueto degrade them.And then you doom yourself because you verbalize that and insult someone, and you might eveninsult a righteous person or someone who Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala has assigned agreat right over you.Like the man who told off his mom only to bray like a donkey.If you accustom yourself to that type of language of telling people off and putting them intheir place, Allah might put you in your place because before he brayed like a donkey inthe grave, he let his tongue loose like a cow.So in our digital world especially, telling someone off is actually overrated becauseyou might win a social media battle, but then Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala mocks you withthat very same mockery in your grave.And Allah says, "wala tajassasu," don't spy.Amr ibn Dinar (رحمه الله) says that the sister of one of the men of Medina died, and he gotdown in her grave to bury her.And then when he came back from the burial, he remembered that he left something in hergrave.So he asked one of his companions to go with him to her grave, and then to help him digup in the spot where he dropped something.And as he digs up the grave of his sister, he sees a pit of fire.So he goes back to his mother and asks her, what was my sister really like?So she says, why are you asking about her?She's already dead.He said, I want you to tell me what she was really like.So she says, well, she used to actually delay the prayer, and then she also used to havethis bad habit of going to our neighbors' doors, and she would put her ear to them andthen tell other people what they said.Are you looking at or listening to conversations that weren't meant for you?And worse, are you spreading those things, and in the process, fueling the fire?
وَلَا يَغْتَبْ بَعْضُكُمْ بَعْضًا And let not one group of you backbite another.أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَن يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتًاWould one of you like to eat the dead flesh of his brother?The Prophet (ﷺ) once came upon a grave whose occupant was being punished, and he lookedat it, and he said (ﷺ), verily this person used to eat the flesh of the people.And the most vivid and severe images that the Prophet (ﷺ) conveyed to us were almostall regarding backbiting and slandering.He (ﷺ) said that I saw people with nails made of copper, with which they scratched theirfaces and their chests.And I asked, who are these, Ya Jibreel?And Jibreel answered and said, these are those who consume the flesh of people and vilifythe honor of others.In one narration, the Prophet (ﷺ) said, I saw a man who was pinned down by another manwhile a third person came and he put an iron hook in his mouth, and he would tear one sideof his face off, and then he would tear the other.And by the time he tore the other side of the face, that side was restored and he wouldgo back again and tear and tear and tear and tear over and over and over again.I said, Ya Jibreel, who are they?And Jibreel (عليه السلام) says, as for the man you came upon, whose sides of mouth and nostrils andeyes were torn off from front to back, says this is the symbol of the man who goes outof his house in the morning and tells so many lies that it spreads all over the world.I want you to think about this.Imagine how regretful someone is right now in their grave for something that they foundfunny at the expense of someone else yesterday.And they made it harder for that person to show their face in public, burying them in shame.And that's why in one narration, the Prophet (ﷺ) said,من رأى عورة فسترها كان كمن أحيا موؤودة
That whoever sees something which should be hidden and then conceals it will be like someonewho brought life to a young girl that was buried alive.Secrets, vulnerabilities, being a witness to someone doing something they're ashamed of,these can turn into knives, brass knuckles of fire, all sorts of things if they findtheir way onto your tongue.So beware, O brothers and sisters, from the flesh of your brothers and sisters.It is not a joke at all.But on the other side, what if you conceal what is meant to be concealed?Then it's like a seed that is buried and will grow gardens in the barzakh, just like thatdescription the Prophet (ﷺ) gave of a person who gives life to a girl that was buried alive.And what is the connection between that baby girl that's buried alive and concealing whatis meant to be hidden?When you come across a weakness of someone, it's as if their reputation is now in yourhands.It's a fragile and vulnerable trust that Allah (ﷻ) has given you in that moment, just likethe baby girl is a trust given to her parents.And they might violate that in the most horrific way by burying her alive.And you too do the same thing when you tear someone's honor and name and reputation inpublic.So what's the greatest way to protect yourself from this destruction?Remember when the Prophet (ﷺ) said that the believer will be flying around in the bodyof a bird, eating from the trees of Jannah?One of the benefits of that is that trees are planted by what?By your dhikr.La ilaha illallah, astaghfirullah, subhanAllah.So while people are cutting their flesh off and eating it, you can instead be enjoyingthe fruit of your subhanAllah, alhamdulillah, la ilaha illallah, Allahu Akbar.Keep your tongue busy with that and avoid the gatherings of people who busy you withother than that.And the next time you feel pressured to drive to go be with people who backbite, remember
instead the flying of the believers to each other on the branches of paradise in Barzakhand say, I want to be one of those birds, not one of those people who are eating theirown flesh.And while you're sitting in your gathering today with the living and still letting thatjoke or that gossip slide, remember that someone who was with you yesterday is at the exactsame moment now eating their own flesh as a result.Just as the wudu on a person's flesh will be light on the Day of Judgment, the darknessof your tongue will lead to your flesh literally being ripped apart.And if a person uses his tongue to light others on fire with backbiting and slandering, thenthat tongue will turn into a fire for him.And the Prophet (ﷺ) said the number one reason for people falling into the fire on the Dayof Judgment is the tongue.But what's the number one reason for which people are punished in their graves?The number one reason for people falling into the fire on the Day of Judgment is the tongue.
And the number one reason for people falling into the fire on the Day of Judgment is thetongue.
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