# Why Is Everything Falling Apart? | Why Me?

**Author:** Dr. Omar Suleiman
**Series:** Why Me
**Published:** 2024-03-29
**YouTube:** https://youtu.be/KeTqsCVv7yg
**URL:** https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/why-is-everything-falling-apart-why-me
**Topics:** Afterlife, Faith

## Description
Change is inevitable. We move through cycles of opposites: of happiness and sadness, of good and bad. But what does it mean when everything is suddenly falling apart? When you face a loss patiently, but are instead faced by regression in a domino effect, the chips of your life falling down rapidly,...

## Transcript
**[0:01]** Change is inevitable. We move through cycles of opposites. Of happiness and sadness. Of good and bad.

**[0:17]** But what does it mean when everything is suddenly falling apart? When you face the loss patiently but are instead faced by regression in a domino effect. The chips of your life falling rapidly down one after another.

**[0:38]** What do you do when it feels like even the blessings you were grasping onto are now rapidly being snatched away? Why does it feel like Allah is taking away the little that was holding you together in the first place?

**[1:01]** Why is it that the Prophet (ﷺ) was sent down as an angel? Why is it that the Prophet (ﷺ) was sent down as a messenger? I want you to imagine how the Prophet (ﷺ) felt after the Battle of Badr.

**[1:20]** Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala just gave you victory over your enemies in a miraculous way that everyone could see. He sends down angels and He particularly attributes that blessing of victory to your du'a. And when you come home to Medina, you have the Ansar ready to receive you and they have more conviction now than ever.

**[1:40]** And then as you enter into Medina, you find out that while everyone is celebrating the great victory, your daughter Ruqayyah (رضي الله عنها) just passed away. And they used to call the day of Badr the day of great joy and the day of great sadness. Because as happy as the Prophet (ﷺ) was that Allah just gave him victory in Badr, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala took away his daughter Ruqayyah (رضي الله عنها) on the very same day.

**[2:06]** And that's usually how life is. You get a ni'mah and then you get a test right after the ni'mah to remind you that you're still in a place of test. Abdullah ibn Umar (رضي الله عنه) narrates that of the du'as that the Prophet (ﷺ) would frequently make was this du'a.

**[2:22]** اللهم إني أعوذ بك من زوال نعمتك وتحول عافيتك وفجاءة نقمتك وجميع سخطك Oh Allah, I seek refuge in You from the sudden decline of Your blessings and the sudden change from being in a state of well-being and the suddenness of Your vengeance and from all forms of Your wrath.

**[2:46]** Tests are throughout our lives, but they often tend to come in sudden bunches rather than these perfectly spaced out speed bumps. As regular as our prayers are throughout the day, our tests are completely unpredictable and unexplainable.

**[3:03]** We're taught to seek refuge in Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala from zawal an-ni'am, the sudden decline of blessings. That moment in your life where everything seems to be spinning into chaos. All of the tests are coming at once and you've lost so much that your mind doesn't even know what to process first.

**[3:22]** With the Prophet (ﷺ), this was the state of 'Am al-Huzn, the year of grief, the worst humiliation in Ta'if, the worst losses of the people he loved in Khadijah (رضي الله عنها) and Abu Talib, the greatest persecution he faced in Mecca and the least opportunity for peace in the world.

**[3:52]** The opportunity he had to preach all happened in the exact same year. Meaning if you took all 23 years of his prophetic career, the worst manifestation of each trial seemed to all come in that one year and that's why it's called 'Am al-Huzn, the year of grief.

**[4:09]** That's what the state of zawal an-ni'am is. Now if we find ourselves in the grips of zawal an-ni'am and our whole world seems to be crumbling down, how do we reevaluate our approach to what's ahead? We start by seeing this phase in our lives as there to either spark our repentance or elevate our rank.

**[4:29]** How do we reconcile this with the idea though that gratitude maintains blessings? There's the saying, النعمة إذا شكرت قرّت وإذا كفرت فرّت. Blessings stay with gratitude and they flee with ingratitude.

**[4:45]** But I was grateful and I saw those blessings flee away. Firstly, it may be that your gratitude held some of the blessings that were meant to otherwise flee or that your gratitude for those blessings caused them to be a means of goodness for you on the Day of Judgment as well.

**[5:01]** Because if you said alhamdulillah for them when you had them, what Allah will give you for the praise on the Day of Judgment is greater than what you enjoyed of that blessing here. But Allah will test with sudden loss regardless. But you don't have to lose yourself when that blessing is lost and that's what's key.

**[5:16]** Compare when Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says, [Al-'Asr 103:1-2] والعصر إن الإنسان لفي خسر. Verily man is in loss to when Allah says [An-Nahl 16:96] ما عندكم ينفد وما عند الله باق. وَلَنَجْزِيَنَّ الَّذِينَ صَبَرُوا أَجَرَهُمْ بِأَحْسَنِ مَا كَانُوا يَعْمَلُونَ.

**[5:33]** What you have will perish and what is with Allah is forever. And We will reward the patient with the best of what they used to do. In this case, you weren't lost and the blessing of patience you were given will yield you far more pleasure than what you had before.

**[5:48]** [Al-Baqarah 2:155] وَلَنَبْلُوَنَّكُمْ بِشَيْءٍ مِّنَ الْخَوْفِ وَالْجُوعِ وَنَقْصٍ مِّنَ الْأَمْوَالِ وَالْأَنفُسِ وَالثَّمَرَاتِ وَبَشِّرِ الصَّابِرِينَ. And We will surely test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and livelihood, but give glad tidings to the patient.

**[6:05]** Notice Allah didn't respond with how specific blessings remedy specific losses. He simply said, give glad tidings to the patient because I will make sure that the sudden losses are met with more than satisfactory gains.

**[6:23]** That's why the Prophet (ﷺ) said, وَمَا أُعْطِيَ أَحَدٌ عَطَاءً هُوَ خَيْرٌ وَأَوْسَعُ مِنَ الصَّبْرِ And no one is given a better or vaster gift than patience.

**[6:45]** Imam al-Hasan al-Basri (rahimahullah) says, الصبرُ كَنْزٌ مِنْ كُنُوزِ الْخَيْرِ Patience is a beautiful treasure of good and Allah will only give it to someone who is worthy in His sight. And someone can say, I get that, but not now.

**[7:01]** It's often that we think we're not so upset with the loss of the blessing or the appearance of hardship, but it's the timing of it all. But in reality, are you sure it would have been better for Allah to spare you of that loss of a loved one in that moment? Are you sure if they lived longer, it would have been better for you or them?

**[7:19]** Are you sure that staying in that job for another year or two would have been better for you? When is a good time to suffer? And that's why Umar ibn Abdul Aziz (rahimahullah) used to say, I have given up on ever trying to overcome the timing of Allah's decree.

**[7:34]** And I have sufficed myself with this du'a. Oh Allah, make me content with Your providence and bless me in Your decree,

**[7:51]** such that I would not like to hasten what has been delayed nor delay what has been hastened. Perhaps He allowed darkness to engulf you so that you could recognize the tremendous blessings He was bestowing upon you.

**[8:11]** We're used to stories giving us a happy ending very quickly. It always shows up at the end of the movie. But the reality is that your test could last for a long period of your life.

**[8:33]** And the blessings you seek might not come to you in this realm of your existence.

**[8:49]** And it won't be easy. You'll struggle every day. You might feel stuck in a state of perpetual grief, unable to lift yourself out of bed, or remember all the lessons you're supposed to have learned by now.

**[9:18]** You don't need to force yourself into happiness. Instead, resort to submission. And focus on your standing in His sight, rather than His delivering you from your plight.

**[9:48]** Say, [At-Tawbah 9:51] There will not be any harm to us except that which Allah has decreed for us. He is our protector. And in Allah let the believers put their trust.

## Other Episodes in "Why Me"
- [Did My Life Really Matter? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/did-my-life-really-matter-why-me.md)
- [When Life Comes Full Circle | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/when-life-comes-full-circle-why-me.md)
- [What Will The Day of My Death Be Like? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/what-do-i-feel-when-im-dying-why-me.md)
- [Will Allah Still Forgive Me? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/will-allah-still-forgive-me-why-me.md)
- [How Can I Accept That I'm Dying? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/how-can-i-accept-that-im-dying-why-me.md)
- [What If It's Too Late? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/what-if-its-too-late-why-me.md)
- [Do Good Deeds Extend My Life? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/do-good-deeds-extend-my-life-why-me.md)
- [Why Is There So Much Suffering in The World? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/why-is-there-so-much-suffering-in-the-world-why-me.md)
- [Can I Escape The Outcome of My Sins? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/can-i-escape-the-outcome-of-my-sins-why-me.md)
- [Is Allah Testing or Punishing Me? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/is-allah-testing-or-punishing-me-why-me.md)
- [Why Did They Have to Die? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/why-did-they-have-to-die-why-me.md)
- [How Do I Find Love in Loneliness?  | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/how-do-i-find-love-in-loneliness-why-me.md)
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- [Why Do They Get the Life I Want? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/why-do-they-get-the-life-i-want-why-me.md)
- [What If I Could’ve Changed Things? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/what-if-i-couldve-changed-things-why-me.md)
- [Why Were Hurtful People Put in My Life? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/why-were-hurtful-people-put-in-my-life-why-me.md)
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- [Why Won't Allah Answer Me? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/why-wont-god-help-me-why-me.md)
- [Did I Choose To Be Muslim? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/did-i-choose-to-be-muslim-why-me.md)
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- [Why Am I Rich or Poor? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/why-am-i-rich-or-poor-why-me.md)
- [Why Do I Look Like This? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/why-do-i-look-like-this-why-me.md)
- [Why Do I Have These (Dis)Abilities? |  Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/why-do-i-have-these-disabilities-why-me.md)
- [What Shaped My Personality? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/what-shaped-my-personality-why-me.md)
- [Why Is This My Family? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/why-is-this-my-family-why-me.md)
- [What Happened On My Birth Day? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/what-happened-on-my-birth-day-why-me.md)
- [Why Did Allah Choose This Time for Me? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/why-did-allah-choose-this-time-for-me-why-me.md)
- [Where Was I Before I Was Born? | Why Me?](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/where-was-i-before-i-was-born-why-me.md)
- [Trailer: Why Me? | A Ramadan Series on Understanding Qadar](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/why-me/trailer-why-me-a-ramadan-series-on-understanding-qadar.md)