# Sincere Advice to an Unwilling Recipient | Daily Reminders

**Author:** Dr. Omar Suleiman
**Series:** Reminders
**Published:** 2020-08-11
**YouTube:** https://youtu.be/LX_-rCCDJLs
**URL:** https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/sincere-advice-to-an-unwilling-recipient-daily-reminders
**Topics:** Acts of Worship, Sharia

## Description
Sometimes the most beautiful of advice and wisdom is not received because the heart of the other person does not want to hear it. How do you help someone who doesn’t want to be helped.

## Transcript
**[0:01]** As-salamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu. A'udhu billahi minash shaitanir rajim. Bismillahir rahmanir rahim. Alhamdulillahi rabbil alameen. Wa la ilaha illa allathalameen. Wa la aqibatu lilmuttaqeem. Allahumma salli wa sallim wa barak ala abdika wa rasulika Muhammadin salallahu alaihi wa sallam wa ala alihi wa sahbihi wa salam taslimil kathira.

**[0:18]** So inshallah ta'ala just some good news that tomorrow night, bidnil naih ta'ala, we will be resuming the firsts and we will be continuing in that series inshallah ta'ala looking at some of the forerunners in Islam. May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala gather us with them,

**[0:33]** with the Prophet salallahu alaihi wa sallam in the highest level of Jannatul Firdaus. Allahumma ameen. And also I just wanted to acknowledge subhanallah the amazing parents who commented on the status about Muhsin, about their own struggles and the incredible sabr

**[0:48]** that they have shown with their conditions. May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala reward all of you. May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala elevate you for what you do. May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala gather you in paradise with your families and allow you to enjoy the limitless

**[1:03]** mercy and bounty of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala for all eternity in Jannatul Firdaus. Allahumma ameen. What I wanted to talk about tonight inshallah ta'ala, and I'll just do this for the next few times bidnil naih ta'ala over the next couple of weeks as we finish out Dhul Hijjah

**[1:18]** the month of Dhul Hijjah was to just extract some of the lessons again from Surah Ibrahim particularly as the lessons pertain to the story of Ibrahim alayhi salam. But then bring it back to a very practical level. And I was going to talk about you know where Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala mentions that he did not

**[1:33]** send, wa ma arsalna min rasoolin illa bilisani qawmihi that we did not send a messenger except in the language of his people. Now I'm going to talk about that inshallah ta'ala probably Wednesday. Which you know there's a technical element to that bilughati qawmihi

**[1:48]** literally in the language of his people and some of the other implied meanings and some of the wisdoms that we can take from that. But I wanted to talk about a bridge of sorts between the story of Ibrahim alayhi salam and some of the

**[2:03]** things that we might encounter in our lives with people that we speak to with the best of language, with the best of guidance, with the best of wisdom and we're unable to reach their hearts. And this is particularly hurtful when you're speaking to someone that you love and

**[2:18]** it particularly is also frustrating at times when you're using the most beautiful of arguments, when you're using the best tone and you're wondering why is it not landing, okay? And what I mean by that is you know this could be a parent

**[2:33]** talking to their child, right? And you're trying to get them to understand and we talked about you know the wisdom of hidayah and we'll talk about that inshallah ta'ala a little bit more bi'dinnahi ta'ala as we close out the lessons from this first page of surah Ibrahim. But you know it's

**[2:48]** frustrating when you're talking to someone and you love them and you want good for them and you're using the best arguments and you're using wisdom and you're using the right tone but they can't hear you and imagine Ibrahim alayhi salam right? He is afsahul anbiya, he's

**[3:03]** the most eloquent of the prophets, the father of the prophets, the most eloquent of the prophets and he's speaking to his people using wisdom, proofs, burhan right? I mean the proofs are there the hikmah is there, the wisdom is there

**[3:18]** the right analogies are being drawn from, right? He's qualifying everything he says to his father by making sure that he continues to affirm his father's honor and position as he gives him da'wah. And what does he get met with when he gives them the most beautiful

**[3:33]** of arguments and he gives them the most beautiful of tones? Ibrahim alayhi salam is met with a threat right? An assassination attempt. He's met with complete rejection and humiliation even though he's utilizing the best mechanics, the best

**[3:48]** wisdom and the most beautiful of preaching and da'wah and this is something that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala tells us about in the Quran. There is nothing more beautiful nothing more beautiful than the kalam of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, than the word of Allah himself, than the Quran itself

**[4:03]** there is nothing more beautiful than ayatul rahman and the verses of the most merciful. But even the verses of the most merciful, they land on dead hearts and it's like a hard surface, right? This beautiful revelation comes down and it

**[4:18]** has absolutely no penetration. Why? Because those hearts are dead. The hearts are rejecting them and it's a turned over container, right? And so you choose to turn over the container so that nothing lands inside of it and that's why Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala

**[4:33]** tells us in surah al-Baqarah, they say our hearts are protected. They mean protected from revelation, protected from penetration of divine wisdom, of this divine beauty. We don't want it, right? So their hearts turn away and so

**[4:48]** their ears are not capable of grasping what their hearts don't want to hear. Their ears are not capable of hearing and grasping what the hearts don't want to hear. And so Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala makes that connection that when a person speaks

**[5:03]** and this is something very important and you can think about and I'm not able to draw out the infographic. Maybe someone from the yaqeen team inshallah can make something out of this. But this idea of speaking from the heart. لا ينفع القلب إلا ما خرج من القلب

**[5:19]** Nothing benefits the heart unless it comes from the heart. And so you're giving da'wah, you're giving advice, you're giving nasiha to someone that you love, that you want good for from your heart. So it comes from the heart to the tongue and of course, you know, it's delivered in that fashion. But

**[5:34]** when it goes to the other person's ears, their hearts are already shut off and so nothing will be able to reach. And so there's the burden of the one that delivers to make sure they're speaking from the heart and they are using the most beautiful of arguments and they're speaking from a beautiful

**[5:49]** place, giving advice from a beautiful place and there's the other person as well. If the other person is not ready to receive it with their hearts then it's going to land on hard surface and it's not going to penetrate in any way whatsoever. And this is something that, you know, especially

**[6:04]** with people that we love that are on a destructive path and this is really what I want us to take home from this bid'ah beyond just the methodology of da'wah. When you're trying to give advice to someone that you love that displays destructive behavior, whether it's a child

**[6:19]** or a sibling or a close friend and you want them to wake up but they're not willing to wake up. They're not showing that they are willing to wake up. Unfortunately sometimes people need to learn the hard way, right? So your child is

**[6:34]** going to reject all the messages that you constantly give them until they face the consequences of that, hopefully in this life not in the next and then they wake up. Likewise your friend, right? You keep giving them nasiha, advice sincere advice from the heart and you're

**[6:49]** wanting good for them, but it's not landing and the hope is that, you know, they wake up sometimes they got to face the consequence in this life and then oh, they wake up and that's when they make the change that's necessary. That's when they then humble their hearts and make their hearts ready

**[7:04]** to receive what Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala is giving to them of divine revelation, divine wisdom and sincere nasiha when we are the ones, sincere advice when we are the ones that are giving it. So again, you're not going to use arguments as beautiful as Ibrahim A.S. with his

**[7:19]** father, but it's not always about the argument you're making. It's about, it also has to come from your heart and the other person's heart has to be ready to receive it. We pray that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala soften our hearts so that we give advice from a place of

**[7:34]** goodwill and we receive advice with an open heart always wanting to incline towards Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. Allahumma ameen. Jazakum Allah khayran inshallah ta'ala. See you tomorrow night at the same time inshallah ta'ala but we'll be doing the first Ibn Allah ta'ala

**[7:49]** and inshallah ta'ala look forward to seeing you there. Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu.

## Other Episodes in "Reminders"
- [A Believer’s Animal Personality Test | Dr. Hassan Elwan](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/a-believers-animal-personality-test-hassan-elwan.md)
- [This Is A Sign That You’ll Go To Jannah | Dr. Hassan Elwan](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/this-is-a-sign-that-you-will-go-to-jannah-hassan-elwan.md)
- [How Allah Shows Love For Us | Dr. Hassan Elwan](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/how-allah-shows-love-for-us-hassan-elwan.md)
- [How Life Changes When You Find the Truth](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/how-life-changes-when-you-find-the-truth-reminder-hassan-elwan.md)
- [Questions About the 6 Days of Shawwal | Live Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/questions-about-the-6-days-of-shawwal-live-reminders.md)
- [What's the best way to read Qur'an? | Live Reminder](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/whats-the-best-way-to-read-quran-live-reminder.md)
- [Better Than Praying All Night | Live Reminder](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/better-than-praying-all-night-live-reminder.md)
- [The Prophets Advice On Having a Clean Heart](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/the-prophets-advice-on-having-a-clean-heart.md)
- [A Major Hidden Benefit of Fasting Regularly | Live Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/a-major-hidden-benefit-of-fasting-regularly-live-reminders.md)
- [Invisible Wounds & Visible Flaws | Live Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/invisible-wounds-visible-flaws-live-reminders.md)
- [Justice in the Court of Allah | Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/justice-in-the-court-of-allah-reminders.md)
- [The Days of Allah | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/the-days-of-allah-daily-reminders.md)
- [To Kill Or Be Killed By a Prophet | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/to-kill-or-be-killed-by-a-prophet-daily-reminders.md)
- [Moses was Not Just Sent to Drown the Pharaoh | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/moses-was-not-just-sent-to-drown-the-pharaoh-daily-reminders.md)
- [The Meaning of Al-Azeez (The Almighty) | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/the-meaning-of-al-azeez-the-almighty-daily-reminders.md)
- [Finding the Right Messenger | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/finding-the-right-messenger-daily-reminders.md)
- [Setting Boundaries for Your Paradise and Inner Peace | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/setting-boundaries-for-your-paradise-and-inner-peace-daily-reminders.md)
- [Degrees of Success | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/degrees-of-success-daily-reminders.md)
- [Is It OK to Wish for Death? | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/is-it-ok-to-wish-for-death-daily-reminders.md)
- [What If You Were Never Born? | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/what-if-you-were-never-born-daily-reminders.md)
- [Prepare for Dhul Hijjah Like You Do Ramadan | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/prepare-for-dhul-hijjah-like-you-do-ramadan-daily-reminders.md)
- [Layers of Misguidance | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/layers-of-misguidance-daily-reminders.md)
- [The Untwisted Truth and the Straight Path | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/the-untwisted-truth-and-the-straight-path-daily-reminders.md)
- [Misery Loves Company | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/misery-loves-company-daily-reminders.md)
- [Hold Yourself to Higher Standards | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/hold-yourself-to-higher-standards-daily-reminders.md)
- [Loving the World Too Much | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/loving-the-world-too-much-daily-reminders.md)
- [How You Act From A Place of Power | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/how-you-act-from-a-place-of-power-daily-reminders.md)
- [When You Can't Be Broken or Bought | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/when-you-cant-be-broken-or-bought-daily-reminders.md)
- [Self Actualization and the One Who Needs No Praise | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/self-actualization-and-the-one-who-needs-no-praise-daily-reminders.md)
- [Fleeing from Darkness to Allah's Light | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/fleeing-from-darkness-to-allahs-light-daily-reminders.md)
- [You Are Responsible, but Not in Control | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/you-are-responsible-but-not-in-control-daily-reminders.md)
- [Book Recommendations from Dr. Jonathan Brown](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/book-recommendations-from-dr-jonathan-brown.md)
- [Keeping Peace Within Our Homes | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/keeping-peace-within-our-homes-daily-reminders.md)
- [How Ali (ra) Spent 4 Dirhams in Search of Allah's Mercy | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/how-ali-spent-4-dirhams-in-search-of-allahs-mercy-daily-reminders.md)
- [When the Prophet Sent People Home from the Masajid for Taraweeh | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/when-the-prophet-sent-people-home-from-the-masajid-for-taraweeh-daily-reminders.md)
- [The Bedouin Who Mastered His Praise with Two Words | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/the-bedouin-who-mastered-his-praise-with-two-words-daily-reminders.md)
- [In that Moment, What Do You Say? | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/in-that-moment-what-do-you-say-daily-reminders.md)
- [The Greatest Way to Seek Allah's Forgiveness | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/the-greatest-way-to-seek-allahs-forgiveness-daily-reminders.md)
- [Expanding and Blessing Your Wealth - Rizq Part 2 | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/expanding-and-blessing-your-wealth-daily-reminders.md)
- [Two Things Allah Keeps Hidden From Us | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/two-things-allah-keeps-hidden-from-us-daily-reminders.md)
- [Gems of Seclusion | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/gems-of-seclusion-daily-reminders.md)
- [The Prophetic Way of Calling Upon Allah | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/the-prophetic-way-of-calling-upon-allah-daily-reminders.md)
- [Tapping into Allah's Treasure - Rizq Part 1 | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/tapping-into-allahs-treasure-daily-reminders.md)
- [Understanding Invisible Wounds | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/understanding-invisible-wounds-daily-reminders.md)
- [Dealing with your Thoughts - Cognitive Distortion Part 3 | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/dealing-with-your-thoughts-cognitive-distortion-part-3-daily-reminders.md)
- [The Du'a That Answers Every Prayer & Removes Every Hardship | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/the-dua-that-answers-every-prayer-removes-every-hardship-daily-reminders.md)
- [Allah Provides for You | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/allah-provides-for-you-daily-reminders.md)
- ['Oh Allah, Reduce My Pain But Not My Reward' | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/oh-allah-reduce-my-pain-but-not-my-reward-daily-reminders.md)
- [Does God Ever Give Us Tests We Can't Handle? | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/does-god-ever-give-us-tests-we-cant-handle-daily-reminders.md)
- [Uncertainty Tolerance | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/uncertainty-tolerance-daily-reminders.md)
- [Feeling Lonely and It's Getting Worse | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/feeling-lonely-and-its-getting-worse-daily-reminders.md)
- [Do Not Wish to Meet Your Enemy in Battle | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/do-not-wish-to-meet-your-enemy-in-battle-daily-reminders.md)
- [Giving Empathy | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/giving-empathy-daily-reminders.md)
- ["What Have You Put Forth?" | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/what-have-you-put-forth-daily-reminders.md)
- [How to Observe the 15th Night of Sha'ban | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/how-to-observe-the-15th-night-of-shaban-daily-reminders.md)
- [Working on the Base - Cognitive Distortion Part 2 | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/working-on-the-base-cognitive-distortion-part-2-daily-reminders.md)
- [Do Not Fear the Virus | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/do-not-fear-the-virus-daily-reminders.md)
- [Heaven's Celebrities are Often Unknown on Earth | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/heavens-celebrities-are-often-unknown-on-earth-daily-reminders.md)
- [“To be spared and grateful is more beloved than to be tested and patient” | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/to-be-spared-and-grateful-is-more-beloved-than-to-be-tested-and-patient-daily-reminders.md)
- [Do Not Forget Who You Are | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/do-not-forget-who-you-are-daily-reminders.md)
- [Don’t Just Ask for the Loss to be Less, Ask for the Replacement to be More | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/dont-just-ask-for-the-loss-to-be-less-ask-for-the-replacement-to-be-more-daily-reminders.md)
- [Seeing Allah's Majesty in Everything | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/seeing-allahs-majesty-in-everything-daily-reminders.md)
- [The Scholar Who Pretended He Couldn't Hear | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/the-scholar-who-pretended-he-could-not-hear-daily-reminder.md)
- [Falling Into Your Thoughts - Cognitive Distortion Part 1 | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/falling-into-your-thoughts-cognitive-distortion-part-1-daily-reminders.md)
- [The Shadows of My Worries | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/the-shadows-of-my-worries-daily-reminders.md)
- [A Means of Purification | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/a-means-of-purification-daily-reminders.md)
- [99 gods vs 99 names of one God | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/99-gods-vs-99-names-of-one-god-daily-reminders.md)
- [Expressing Love for Those Around Us | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/expressing-love-for-those-around-us-daily-reminders.md)
- [Assuming the Best of Allah | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/assuming-the-best-of-allah-daily-reminders.md)
- [Buying What You Want When You Feel Like It | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/buying-what-you-want-when-you-feel-like-it-daily-reminders.md)
- [The Glass is Half Full | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/the-glass-is-half-full-daily-reminders.md)
- [Two Blessings that are Rarely Combined | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/two-blessings-that-are-rarely-combined-daily-reminders.md)
- [Building Our Faith with Consistency | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/building-our-faith-with-consistency-daily-reminders.md)
- [Finding the Positives During Hard Times | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/finding-the-positives-during-hard-times-daily-reminders.md)
- [Make Peace and Move On | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/make-peace-and-move-on-daily-reminders.md)
- [Not Going Back, but Growing Forward | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/not-going-back-but-growing-forward-daily-reminders.md)
- [Maintaining a Positive Assumption of Allah During the COVID-19 Pandemic | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/maintaining-a-positive-assumption-of-allah-during-the-coronavirus-pandemic-daily-reminders.md)
- [The Death of the Prophet & the Vision of Ibn Abbas | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/the-death-of-the-prophet-the-vision-of-ibn-abbas-daily-reminders.md)
- [Processing News and Seeking the One True Source of News | Daily Reminder](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/processing-news-and-seeking-the-one-true-source-of-news-daily-reminder.md)
- [The Role of Remembrance in a Crisis | Daily Reminder](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/the-role-of-remembrance-in-a-crisis-daily-reminder.md)
- ["Avoiding that which doesn't concern you” | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/avoiding-that-which-doesnt-concern-you-daily-reminders.md)
- ["When will life go back to normal?" | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/when-will-life-go-back-to-normal-daily-reminders.md)
- [To Put a Smile on the Face of your Brother or Sister | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/to-put-a-smile-on-the-face-of-your-brother-or-sister.md)
- [Lightening Calamities with Conviction | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/lightening-calamities-with-conviction-daily-reminders.md)
- [2 Things We Take for Granted | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/2-things-we-take-for-granted-daily-reminders.md)
- [Find Clarity in Your Cave | Daily Reminders](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/reminders/find-clarity-in-your-cave-daily-reminders.md)