# 6,000 Bodies Washed and Buried | Dr. Omar Suleiman and Sh. Ahmad Hraichie, “The Muslim Undertaker”

**Author:** Dr. Omar Suleiman
**Series:** The Other Side | Barzakh and Beyond
**Published:** 2025-04-15
**YouTube:** https://youtu.be/rx-mz9qGQ4I
**URL:** https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/6000-bodies-washed-and-buried-muslim-undertaker-the-other-side-barzakh
**Topics:** Afterlife, Faith

## Description
Patience and gratitude are the keys to contentment, in this life and the next. For every hardship, patience brings peace and grows gardens of reward.

## Transcript
**[0:00]** Shaykh Ahmed, when you are in a room and there are seven, eight bodies on a table and it's just you and it's completely quiet, but you know that there are eight bodies, eight souls, each one of them going through their own tribulation or reward at that moment. Tell me what you know what's going through your mind, Shaykh, as you're sitting in that room with eight bodies. SubhanAllah, Shaykh, the first thing that goes through your mind is every single

**[0:23]** one of them has a family. Every single one of them has a blueprint, belong to a certain house, had a certain life, ate certain foods and all different ages. Everyone had a story as they say, every one of those souls. As it moves forward and I find out, usually I know some of these people because they're from the community. You say to yourself, what are they, the thing I say, Shaykh, is what are they seeing? Where are they right now?

**[0:39]** We know roughly what we've been taught by the Prophet ﷺ, by the souls. But to see the body there lifeless, stretched on a table, it's the most reality that any living can see. Because once upon a time, especially if I've known them, I've seen them in the community. They were out and about. So what goes through my mind is this is the reality, this is the ending. And very soon they're not even going to be on that table anymore.

**[0:59]** They're going to be in a tomb in the ground, in the dirt. You do this for a living. SubhanAllah, on a personal level, I remember the first time I was asked to come as an imam to wash the body. The brother had been found after eight days dead in his room. And just the smell of the body when I walked in, till today, I have not forgotten that smell over 20 years ago. And I still remember that smell from 20 years ago. Like if I smelled it today, even as I'm talking about it, I remember

**[1:15]** the smell. How do you convey that to someone? The smell of the dead, the look of the dead, what is that? Are there even any words that could convey that to someone? As you know, we're a jifah, we're a corpse and we will decompose. Any piece of meat, flesh, you leave it out there, it decomposes. We will decompose. You know, when you say this story, Shaykh, I remember back in 1996 when I was collecting dead bodies as a side job, first year finishing high school. I went and collected a refugee, an immigrant, who was just on a mattress in a unit in Parramatta, in a city suburb. When we went in there, we were called by the sheriff because there was such a bad smell coming

**[1:36]** out. He'd been dead for about six to seven weeks. When I went in there, obviously maggots is part of the process. It has to eat the body away. He had died of a heart attack, so he was on the ground with his hand like this. Next to him was a paper that had fallen. That paper was saying that he was eligible now for Centrelink payments, which is government payments, to help him survive. He didn't even get those payments. He died reading that letter. When I opened his cupboard in the kitchen, it was a basic kitchen. He had a couple of cans

**[1:54]** of soup and a couple of consumables. I'll never forget that smell. It was the first time I ever vomited. On the other hand, two weeks ago, I had a brother who passed away in November of 2023. He was under the guardian of the government. The government does things slow, as you know. When he did come to our attention, we went straight away and picked him up about 10 days ago. It was the second day of Ramadan. His finger was in Shahada still. I actually took a video of it. His finger was in Shahada. His face was still, his body was still very well.

**[2:11]** The skin was starting to obviously dissolve. His face wasn't good, but everything was good because the face is the first part that decomposes. It's got the thinnest skin on it. I just looked at that finger and I said, for four months now, you've held that finger in the same position. I couldn't even change it. I thought, Allahu Akbar. Allah preserves people. Again, Shaykh, it's the soul that is what matters. It reminds me, there's a moment with Umar bin Abdulaziz, rahimahullah. He was the Khalifah of the Muslims. When Umar,

**[2:26]** radi Allahu ta'ala anhu, assumed the Khilafah, he felt such an amanah as the Khalifah of the Muslims that he relinquished the wealth of this world, that he changed, physically changed. One of his old friends had returned after a journey, Ka'ab al-Quradi, and we looked at him. When he saw him after that journey, he said, where is Umar bin Abdulaziz? He genuinely could not recognize him. Umar told him, I'm him. He thought he was like a servant or something like that. He said, what happened to you? He said to him, if you think this is bad, then think of my body after three days in the grave. After it has rotted and the maggots of the earth have consumed it. If you think this is bad,

**[2:45]** then imagine me in the grave after three days. SubhanAllah, that's the reality here, is that these people did not focus on the embellishment of the body because they were focused on the enrichment of the soul. They didn't see themselves as bodies with souls. They saw themselves as souls with bodies. You definitely see the difference with the righteous and these miracles that happened, subhanAllah, at the time of death, the Shahada finger, and even at the point of death, you sometimes can visualize the Hadith of the Prophet, the soul leaving like a smooth drop of water. You can see it sometimes. I've seen it on videos. I've witnessed it with my own mom. People think it's a,

**[3:05]** because when something ends, it deflates, right? With the soul, it's different. It's a breath in. It's opposite. People don't realize that. Anything that you deflate to end will let the air out, deflate what's in it. With the human body, it doesn't deflate. It draws the last breath. It just goes, and then it just, subhanAllah, the soul leaves. Allahu Akbar. This is what I noticed. Another big thing I noticed from the teachings of our religion is the feet. When it tells you the soul starts from the feet and it works its way up and

**[3:21]** everything starts to go cold and, you know, where's the people to help? And it happens in the hospitals. The feet are always like this, Shaykh. They're always, you know, our feet are like this normally. They're like this. They're all down. Only ones it's not down on is the kids. With the children, it's still just a slight twitch, but nothing extreme like an adult. So we can, I feel that the adult obviously will go through much more perseverance in the time of death with Sakaratul Mawt compared to a child. I mean, the Prophet, sallallahu alayhi wasallam,

**[3:39]** mentioned that there's the inevitable like squeeze of the grave, that even a child will have a squeeze, but the squeeze is not the same for everyone. Death is not the same for everyone. We ask Allah for an easy and smooth process. Allahumma ameen. Shaykh Ahmad, how many bodies do you think you've washed in your life? Thousands. Any ballpark number? I've been doing this for a long time. So if we're doing roughly 400 males a year, because there's females, let's say, ball figure 400 a year over the last 15 years, you know, thousands. And what started

**[3:57]** this journey for you? Well, the journey started with me being infatuated with death. As a young guy, I would listen to an Anasheed that my mum would play when I was 14 by a guy called Ja'afari. I said it to the boys before. And he would say these words, Ja'u maaka wa tarakook, wa fittu raabi dafanook, wa lawdallu maaka, ma nafa'ook, wa liya nfa'ook al-ana illa Allah. And these words, they resonated with me. And these words obviously mean, they came with you and they left you. And if they stayed with you, they would not have benefited you. You know, subhanAllah, that to Allah you shall return. And the only one that benefits you now is Allah. Being 14, I didn't understand those words to the way I understand them now. But I

**[4:14]** used to hold my breath in bed and close my eyes and try to get my heart rate so slow that I felt like I was going through that process. That they had carried me, left me, and I'm by myself in a grave. And obviously, we picture a grave being tight. And you know, as a prophesied, it's the horrific sight you could ever see. And that's what drew me. And the real first encounter practically was when I got my driver's license, P-Plate and I would drive to a job and that job required me to go past the cemetery. I turned left one day and drove past that cemetery.

**[4:29]** And that cemetery is the biggest cemetery, operating cemetery in the world right now, Rookwood Cemetery. And I went in there, subhanAllah, the Muslim section came right in front of me. And I got out of the car and I walked amongst the graves. And this is a 17-year-old. I started looking at pictures and reading names. And I remember one that stood out was a 90-year-old and a 30-year-old. And I did the math in my head, 30, 60, 90, three times. Why was he given three times the chance than him? This was what I'd say to myself. He had three times more life than him.

**[4:47]** And then I would see ages, I would see names, I would see different cultures. Then the pictures, the pictures on a grave are the happy pictures. The timers of a wedding, of a happy moment in suits, looking at the camera, smiling. I'd look at those photos, analyze them. I'd say, at that time in his life, he was so happy. He never thought of death. He didn't think that whatever months or years later he would be a picture on a headstone. And subhanAllah, I ended up buying a whippersnipper and cutting the grass in the cemetery by myself

**[5:05]** because I felt like it was such an untidy place and being a Muslim to the point where I got questioned by people of the cemetery coming to me, authority saying, who's telling you to do this? Are you here on work release? Are you a parole kind of jail person that's doing this? I said, no, no, I'm doing it myself. And they were dumbfounded. What would you be cutting grass and neatening up cemeteries? And that was my first encounters in the cemetery. What was the first washing like for you? First washing was our neighbor. SubhanAllah,

**[5:20]** it was, I won't say his name. It's my father-in-law's neighbor. I was married at 18. So he would always be next door and sitting with the neighbor and he'd always drinking coffee. The Middle Eastern thing, they sit on the veranda and have a coffee in that. And his name came up and I went to pick him up. And I didn't, I didn't, you know, subhanAllah, when someone is dead and when you see them dead, but you know them when they're alive, they look different. You don't always can put the two together. It's a different look sometimes,

**[5:37]** especially when it's a scenario of a killing or a horrific site. But when you know who it is and you go in there, oh yeah, that's such and such. Picked him up, took him back. When we washed him, back then I was the washing helper. I was 18 years old. So I used to help the old man. And I was like freaking out. Like, man, I see this guy every night sitting on the veranda, having a coffee, talking loud, you know, engaging in everyday talk. I thought, man, he's dead. Like, is he really dead? And months passed and he was never on that veranda again. And that was like,

**[5:54]** that was freaky. That was just making me realize that it's true. It's real. This is not a movie. It's not science fiction. So Shaykh, when you think about the Barzakh, what does that look like to you? What do you think of the Barzakh? Because you know they're alive, right? Of course. We believe they're alive. The Barzakh for me, really, I feel the most I get close to is when I sleep and have a good, like I was telling you before, being on a long travel, I went into this deep sleep. I never sleep more than two hours. I'm always up, then sleep again. Went for a five hour deep sleep. And you know, when you get hit with a tired, deep sleep, it remind me of the day we're going to be summons to wake up and all look to the place where we're

**[6:13]** going to walk to. And I always think to myself, the person who dies, he knows he's dead. When he hears the water, hears the footsteps leaving, he feels the people carrying, he can hear the chatter. He can feel it all. He knows it all. But he's dead. But then when he enters that Barzakh life after the questioning and that window and furnishing to be come to him, then he visits just like we're living. All the ones he missed. And for me, it's my mum. It's the first person I want to go visit. And then I think to myself, all these people I've

**[6:29]** washed and served. And sometimes in a Western country, it's hard because you have to really forcefully try to get the deceased as quick as possible out of the government agencies, the coroners. So we fight, we put our lives on the line. Basically, we get aggressive sometimes, but it's all for the Ikram and Mayyit. And I think to myself, will these deceased, will I meet them in Barzakh? Will they come to me in Barzakh and say, thank you for getting me out of the coroner's as quick as possible, for honouring, for putting the messages out on

**[6:45]** the Janazah announcements, reaching thousands of people to make du'a for me. With social media now, you can make a du'a from across the globe, pointing out about someone who died, even if you don't know his story. That's what Barzakh is to me, man. It's that transition that if we're happy in Barzakh, how happy we're going to be after it. Meeting the ones that have left you, your Sahabis of this world, the ones you have these memories that Allah took before you. To me, Barzakh is the glad tidings of seeing them again and hearing that they're going to be waiting for

**[7:04]** you. So, subhanAllah, your mom, Allah yarhamha. The whole reason why I went into this subject was because when I lost my mom, everything was about, where is she now? When do I get to see her again? Have you seen her in dreams? Aren't they the best dreams? Shaykh, do you find those dreams, they come to you at a time where you miss them so much? Allah gives you that fulfilment in a five-second dream. It feels like five seconds, but when you wake up, you feel like, I just got fulfilled. I just drank a full glass, a cup of water of happiness from seeing her. That's how

**[7:22]** I feel when I see her in my dream. Those five seconds can sustain you for five years. Yeah. It fills up that void of loneliness when you miss them. It doesn't do to you when you go to a grave. Sitting on a grave, it's not the same as, mom was cooking in Ramadan and mom's taking us to bite, you know, spending a little bit extra, which is not supposed to. SubhanAllah, the idea of, you know, two hugs, when I think of the barzakh, hugging my mom, hugging and prophesying. That's it. It's like, I just want those two people

**[7:41]** to be there for you. What does your circle look like in barzakh? SubhanAllah, I always dream that the Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam will point me out, will notice me, just like you notice the horse with the marking, will notice me as the ones who did as much good as he can on this earth. You know, the one who helped as much people transition from this world to the next in the most easiest, smoothest possible way and bring in an innovation of, inshallah Allah accepts it, of social media, reminding people of the death of what we do now.

**[8:02]** The Prophet sallallahu alayhi wa sallam sees this as such a khair that you did a sunnah, of reminding people about the death, reminding people to visit the cemetery. I want to stand out. I've always been a person, not a high achiever, but always been a person that wants to do something harder than anybody else does. Only because I know the rewards are always better. You know, being pointed on that day, who are these people? Why are they the VIPs? You want to be the VIPs. You know, that's interesting, like you're a big man, mashaAllah, but the mention of your mom

**[8:18]** brings you to immediate, like to your child-like self and that's, I feel like all of us, it doesn't matter who you are, when mom gets mentioned just that you come out like a child again, right? You know, I always tell myself subhanAllah that as big as we got, we were still little kids to our moms. To others we were a man, but to our moms we were still children, still her kids. It doesn't matter how big we got, you know, I overshadowed my mom at one stage, but I was still a kid to her. If I put my head down and she grabbed my ear, then that was it, you know, that's my mom.

**[8:37]** And look at that, where does that happen anywhere except in Islam, in our life, in this world? Allah has put this rahmah in us, subhanAllah. The same rahmah that we sat in that stomach, in her womb. Yeah, I was like a foot and a half taller than her. You would have been, subhanAllah. So proud of you. Like you said, we remained their children and I think that studying the Barzakh, it lets you know that it's like mom's at home and you're awake. It's almost like you have to have a perspective shift. You know, like when we all went out to study or we went out to do whatever we had to do, like we were the ones that were gone and they were at home. But I actually started to think of it

**[8:56]** and say to myself, mom's at home, I'm the one that's awake. Because dunya is actually the travel. Like it's not, they didn't travel, we traveled, right? In a sense that she's in her rightful place. May Allah grant her the best of Jannah and grant your mother the best of paradise and widen their graves. It was like, we're the ones traveling, not them. So that was a perspective shift I had to make. Like I'm the one that's awake, not her. And I need to go back to that. When you read Kitab al-Ruh Ibn Qayyim, the book of the soul, there are narrations upon narrations of

**[9:12]** people's bodies responding in certain ways because the soul is still somewhat connected to the body. Husn al-Khitam versus Su' al-Khitam, a good ending versus a bad ending. And obviously, while you're doing the washing, sometimes you can just, I mean, I didn't wash as many bodies as you, but sometimes you just, you feel something like this is a righteous person. Like whether it's the Shahada thing or just something else, like at ease, like sometimes you're washing someone, they look like a king, with a smile on their face. What's the most hopeful experience you've

**[9:28]** ever had? And what's the most harrowing experience you've ever had while washing a body? Well, there's been so many experiences, Shaykh. You know, there's, you know, when people say, oh really, does a deceased feel like he's dead? You know, this kind of mentality. You know, subhanAllah, I remember last year a young boy passed away. He was 15, cancer, suffered cancer for a long time, got over it, then they hit him at the end and took him. The same day I picked up an older lady. I had them both in the cool room next to each other. The father of the boy, he's a friend of mine, stayed with him as long as he possibly could

**[9:46]** before we had to go. If you saw the smile on the boy, he would have cried. He was smiling. He was so happy. SubhanAllah, obviously the lady, we don't look at her, we don't, we just keep her covered. The next day, the father was there early and he went to sit with his son a bit. And his son was the one who used to tell his father, dad, you be patient, you be patient. Exactly what you see overseas happening. He said to me, Ahmed, what's wrong with him? He's changed appearance in his face. He's not smiling in him. I said, don't worry, don't worry. This is probably the environment,

**[10:02]** probably, you know, whatever it is, you got to make it easy. When we washed him and shrouded him, the smile came out bigger than ever. You could see the front two teeth. SubhanAllah, the other person in that room wasn't such a good person. You realize later that the souls being in the same environment at night, bin Jazil, they get kind of, you know, as a prophet sallallahu alayhi wasallam said, bury your dead in the closest Islamic cemetery. For the deceased, it's like your neighbors, your neighbors can harm you.

**[10:18]** So to bury in a non-Islamic or to have neighbors that are harmful, it can happen in the grave too. So that is why we use the Islamic cemeteries. And I thought, man, he had a neighbor, maybe she wasn't a good neighbor to him. Because as soon as he was washed and moved away, it felt like the soul was so happy. Wallah, this is one little example. I feel like they feel it. They, they sense it. But the others, there are so many shaykhs, there are ones who, you know, who subhanAllah, you find their faces radiate. And I don't say anything. The people in the room say it. The family says he's smiling. He's, Allahu Akbar. He's actually widened up as dark as their skin is. From whatever part of the world is, they get this noor in them that is unmatched. The finger, we

**[10:39]** see the finger, that's evidence. The videos of them as they're dying, what they say is evidence. That's video evidence there. You know, the ones bringing, giving salams. I've seen them giving salams, giving salams. And the people in the room go, who's he giving salams to? The angels. Umar ibn Abd al-Aziz, when he was dying, his face lit up and he said, welcome to these beautiful faces that are not the faces of human beings or jinn. So he said it, his family saw him. And you see people when they're dying, they'll suddenly say like the name of someone that passed away before them, or like they're talking

**[10:57]** to someone. And then you see that last moment and just like you said, it's subhanAllah, it's a breath in. It's not a breath out. And then that's it. Like you can feel it at times. And you see sometimes someone covering their face. Like as if something is charging at them. My grandfather's brother, subhanAllah, I remember he said to his wife and his son, leave. There's a man in white here who wants to talk to me. And they looked and there's no doctor in the room. Isn't it interesting dismissing people? Because Umar ibn Abd al-Aziz dismissed his family too. So I need to talk to them right now. SubhanAllah, there's an interesting part to that. He dismissed them. As soon as they walked down the corridor, got to the front, they called

**[11:16]** them back, said he's just passed away. Allahu Akbar. And then the other side of the coin, you see some very bad sides. And Allah make it easy for us. And you know, some of these traits are people that ate the rights of people. Some of these are people who back spread rumors, slandered people, oppressed people, all the things we know. Those are the worst. Those are the worst. Right. The ones that the people that were known to have loose tongues. Yeah. Those are the worst. And you see it evident on there, on there. Yeah. And not just evident in the company that comes, the company that comes to the funeral too. Not just the company.

**[11:36]** The company of the people that come because the people that come to your funeral, it resembles a lot of who you were. SubhanAllah. When you see a righteous person die, every sheikh comes from every masjid. You get masheikh from everywhere coming for that person. And when it's a person who's not such a good person, you see the bare minimum. And no one's really got anything to say. They remain silent. And as the Prophet ﷺ said, speak good of the dead or remain silent. And you find them, they remain silent. Allah samha. Allah samha. I mean, we still pray janazah and we seek forgiveness

**[11:53]** for people. And obviously there, there are these unknown righteous people that have small groups, but you're right. When there's someone that has, like when you look at the group at the janazah, and that resembles your company in life, most of the time, right? That resembles your social circle. SubhanAllah. When you say the ones who are quiet groups, you know, you get, for example, Revert Brothers. Yeah. Or for example, a student coming out, he's Ubering to support his family back home while studying and gets hit by a car. Yeah. And you'll find at his funeral, there's nobody. But Allah sends another funeral the same day with a big family. And all of a sudden that family's praying janazah for this person who would have had freefall, being us.

**[12:12]** I've noticed that happens so much. Allah samha. He'll never forsake a soul. He'll never forsake you. He'll always have things in place where you're going to get the most out of, out of what you're worth. And even if people later on make dua for you, and when we say, Allahumma ghfir lil-mu'minina wal-mu'minat wal-muslimina wal-muslimat, we're including them. They're included in our duas. And Allah Azawajal knows the degree of their Islam, the degree of their iman. So it could be that our duas reach them in the night time.

**[12:29]** When, when, when you said that just now, I remember the dua of entering the graveyard. Yeah. As-salamu alaykum ahl al-diyar. Min al-muslimina wal-mu'minin, for example. I used to think to myself, muslimun, understand the Muslims. Mu'minun, wow, another level. It's like you're giving salams to everyone in there, because we all had shortcomings. Every single one of us has shortcomings. Not everyone is the strongest of believers. There's people out there, you know, I think to myself, always, always the hadith of the man who forgave, you know, who entered the

**[12:44]** prophecy, the next man to go through these doors is a man of Jannah. And all he did was forgive. And as simple as forgiving, you don't need these mountains and mountains of, of righteous deeds that sometimes in our life, current life, it's hard to maintain. Yeah. But just to have a simple, pure heart, illa man atallaha biqalbin salim, come to Allah with a pure heart, pure sound heart. And isn't that where it all happens when you die? Isn't that the reality of when you die, your hands are open, you've given the world up and you've got nothing on you, nothing except that box of deeds.

**[13:00]** You know, Shaykh SubhanAllah, my mom, Allah yarhamha, one of her defining traits was she never used to speak bad about people. You know, very beautiful, beautiful posture towards people. She had a brother, my uncle, Allah yarhamhu. He didn't used to pray. He was not practicing. Then the last six months of his life, he started practicing. Now, SubhanAllah, his whole life, his best characteristic was that he hated to backbite. Like if someone started backbiting for him, even though he didn't used to pray, he wasn't religious. He'd like wave them off to like

**[13:17]** stop talking about it. Yeah. Hated it. And Allah Azawajal guided him in the last six months to start practicing. He was coming to Jumu'ah. He's in his 80s, by the way. Last six months of his life, starts coming to Jumu'ah. And he died on Laylatul Jumu'ah, on the night of Friday. And we prayed janazah on him. The khutbah that he recently had started attending. And instead I was giving the khutbah and he had his casket right in the middle of the congregation. His face looked beautiful. His janazah has so much sakinah, so much tranquility. And I tell people, you know, that's the, when the Prophet says, if Allah loves someone at the end of his life, he sweetens him up. He sweetens him up. Those traits were in him. When he didn't like people talking, he didn't like

**[13:35]** people backbiting, he would move away from that. He'd stop people. It was clear in him. Yeah. You know, SubhanAllah, it's amazing, isn't it? It's amazing. I had so many ideas pop in my head now. SubhanAllah, when you talk about death, you know, I remember my own brother-in-law was 41 just recently, about 18 months ago, got a brain aneurysm. Didn't even know it, just felt a headache, went to the hospital, was in a coma the next day. And he was a good man. He used to do a lot of good, worked hard, provide for his family. Actually was in Australia to work, then go back and give back to his family, even though he was from Australia. And I remember going to the hospital. He had no family here. His family's all in Lebanon. Stood next to him. And I looked at him and I

**[13:55]** said, you're a good man. Allah will never forsake you. They said to me, look, he's practically dead. The machine's not doing anything. They turned the machine off. Before they turned it off, the doctor said to me, look, don't be scared. There's this thing called the Lazarus effect. You've heard of the Lazarus effect when the body jumps. Machine was turned off within 11 seconds, his soul departed with just that. No Lazarus effect, no jumping, no nothing. SubhanAllah, thought to myself, Allah. Allah is the true. Allah is the true, Allah, because he protected him at his time of death. He protected

**[14:14]** him, SubhanAllah. It's like when you're washing someone, some of the ilm mentioned that as you're washing the body, that at that moment, the believing soul is witnessing their place in Jannah. Some of the scholars gave this analogy and they used the Hadith of Jibril, washing the heart of the Prophet, before he ascended. And so that's why I say perfect the washing, because they're in a state of witnessing. You're witnessing their body, their soul is witnessing their place. You're sending them out from here. They're looking to where they're going from there. When you're washing a believer, don't you

**[14:29]** just feel like this person knows right now that this was worth it, like all those sacrifices, all those years of submission, all those years of sitting out the haram in this world and focusing on the akhirah, all those years of being different, tareeb, strange, that was worth it. Don't you just feel it when you're washing someone? The whole room feels it. There's this feeling you can't explain it, Shaykh. It's like everything flows. The wash is so easy, the water runs off. It's like at the end, you don't even need to dry

**[14:48]** him. It's like he's telling me, and everything, picking him up off the table, you don't even need two people. It becomes so easy. When we kaffin, and another thing, subhanAllah, I always cut my kaffin to perfection. I don't take shortcuts, because I remember the hadith of the Prophet, peace and blessings of Allah be upon him, said, cut your kaffin, kaffinoo and the best of kaffin. Because if I see a lot on there, I cut it out, I move it. Because I think to myself, when I'm kaffining that person tightly, and nicely, and in a way that will be presented in the barzakh, he's

**[15:07]** going to visit. So what better way to visit than presented in a beautiful way? They may say, who gave you this beautiful shrouding? And people tell me, but brother, you overdo it with the shrouding, like you go perfect. I said, I'm not, I'll overdo it with me one day. I want the same done. The way the knots are tied, the way the hands are placed, I make sure everything is right, subhanAllah. By the way, there's so many narrations of people thanking the one who did their ghusl, the one who did their kafan. So many narrations from the Ridamah, in this regard. Have you ever seen a dream?

**[15:25]** Yeah, I've seen a lot. I don't know these people. In the summertime, you know, I have that qayloolah at four o'clock in the afternoon, it's long days, it gets like 8.30. You come back from the cemeteries about three o'clock, 3.30, long hot days, you have a bit of a qayloolah before asr, and they come to me. And they thank me. I've seen it many times. I don't know these people. The only image I've got of them is I've washed them. Or I've seen their identification when I'm filling up their forms, I've seen their passport, their license. This is widely narrated from the scholars.

**[15:45]** They come to me, they thank me. And I wake up and I think, Allahu Akbar, was this real? SubhanAllah, you know, a lot of times, Shaykh, especially the ones who are pure in their life, who live the life of always being in a state of wudu, praying, cleansing their soul, because iman is not dawfir, right? You know, the body is a jifah, and the body, what you've eaten comes out. And some of these people, subhanAllah, medications, the bowels loosen, constipation from medicines, whatever. I have to make sure they are cleansed to the T, meaning you massage the stomach. I massage it

**[16:05]** so much that my wrist almost falls off sometimes because I start massaging it gently, until every single impurity is removed. Because my biggest fear, Shaykh, and it's happened, and I learned it the hard way, is when you have that body sitting there, and you lift him, and you're in the grave, and they're passing him over to you, and you see the bottom of him in white shroud, and the impurity has come out, I want to keep myself in that grave and not come out. Because I feel like I've just shorted him, even though it wasn't in my control. So I make sure it's done

**[16:22]** perfect. That's one of the most humbling things, subhanAllah, when you see someone who is very strong, powerful, how vulnerable you are on that table, when the ghusl is being done for you. Like you can't even, you can't even clean your bowels. No, and I know when it gets done, you can see the close family members in there just turn and humble themselves. Everyone humbles themselves, because this is a thing you do for all your life yourself. And you know one day someone's going to have to do it for you. And I think to myself, Allah samahna, if I ever do anything wrong, and Allah have mercy

**[16:38]** on us. But I try to do it, I make sure a deceased is to the T, pure. Because I find once you've cleansed all that, they feel like a load's come off them. You feel they ease up, the body eases, it's like, please now wash me, I'm pure and clean again, the way I was when I was alive. Shaykh Ahmad, when you're in the grave, have you ever seen anything, felt anything in a grave? Shaykh, we've witnessed beautiful smells coming out of graves. People have smelt it. A lot of times I

**[16:55]** don't say anything. People notice, because there are people that think like me or think even more than me. We've had smells, and I'll ask, the boys later ask, boys did you just like throw extra in there or something? No man, we used what we do. You'll smell the beautiful smell. I remember two sisters, 92, 93 years old, died a day apart, buried two years ago. I buried both of them because the family was an extended family and they weren't really very Islamically driven and didn't know the, they were more you know culturally, so they don't jump in graves, they don't do none of that.

**[17:12]** So I had the honor of burying both sisters next to each other. And subhanAllah, the family delayed this funeral by two days because you know, there was that culture, I want to get everyone together and all this. But one man, old man came there, and he wasn't related to the family, but he knew the two ladies. He said they used to hold on to their din so much, but they couldn't control what the family was doing. When they, we had the coffins and Allah remember, she basically wanted to jump out of the coffin and get into the grave. She came straight on her side facing Qibla on her right

**[17:31]** side. The Prophet ﷺ said, قَدِّمُونِي قَدِّمُونِي that the righteous soul saying, take me, take me, hurry up. Yeah, so we can't control things sometimes. And I have, the onus is on me is to tell them the right way, and it's up to the family. But these two sisters, I'll never forget the smells that came out of those graves. And they are the first two sisters buried in that new section that we're still being used now. And I always, when I'm there, I always go back there and I have a look at the two graves again. I think, is the smell still there? The smell is still there.

**[17:48]** What about the opposition? Look, when I was a grave digger, 15 years, I was a grave digger. And I used to dig, wait for the body to come. So it'd be an hour, hour and a half away. So I'd go back to my truck, I'd sit there, I'd have my lunch. And I'd go back to the grave. And I remember once I saw a burrow, and the graves are 40 centimeters apart, 30 centimeters. I saw this big hole come out of the grave. And it was this big, big blue tongue lizard. You know a blue tongue, like a goanna, big lizard, but it looked like a snake's head. And it just popped out. And I was like freaking out. And it

**[18:06]** came straight out and it sat in the grave. It came from the grave next door. And I thought to myself, how am I going to get rid of this? So I got the machine and I tried to get it, like scare it. And it couldn't climb up two meters. And maybe, we didn't know how to go back into the hole it came from. So I basically cut it in half and just pulled it out. And I looked at it and I said, man, where's this thing seen now? What has it seen? What has it heard? Because they got senses. And that was one of the things I've seen. Recently, we saw a snake coming through the graves,

**[18:21]** but it wasn't a Muslim section, it was next to us. It was a Russian Orthodox section, actually. The snake was actually just, we took a photo of it. It came through the graves, trying to get through to another grave. But I've never seen animals at the grave. I've never seen dogs, cats. Well, it makes sense. So the Prophets, like I mentioned, they hear the punishment of the graves. And that's why you never see them. It would be terrifying to, you'd never see them sitting around. It's terrifying to them.

**[18:37]** So that's something actually I noticed too, sometimes, because like my mother, she loved cats, a lot of cats at the house. I grew up in a place where we had dogs. She'd just go outside and start playing with cats, like stray cats. And then they'd become members of the household within a week or two. But I noticed when I'd go to the graveyard, and we had a lot of dogs around where we lived, but none of them were anywhere near the graves. They would stay away. And that's when the Prophets, like I said, talks about these things hear the punishment of the grave. Allah has spared you. They hear the punishment of the grave. Can you imagine if they hear that, that's going to...

**[18:53]** We wouldn't bury our dead. We wouldn't bury our dead. That's what he said. SubhanAllah. And another thing I tell people, a lot of people, when I'm giving a bit of a quick reminder at the cemetery, is, and how come with the catholic, subhanAllah, we're all competing on this earth. But when it comes to the cemetery, you never see an ATM machine. You never see any sort of transactions with currency there. There's nothing to buy there. That's one thing you notice, that it's such a bare, plain place, but it gives so much sakina to some believers. People go there and

**[19:08]** tell me, it is the only place I feel at ease. I feel at peace. When I get back out of those gates, it's just ugly. You see the world for what it is. You see the world for what it is. Once you visit the grave and you make that a part of your habit, you see the world for what it is, without a doubt. It's the most clarifying place in the world. That's the graveyard. Well, Shaykh, whenever people tell me, how do I come closer to Allah? I say, go visit the cemetery. Yeah.

**[19:23]** Go visit the ones who walked amongst you before you. Had the same goals, maybe greater goals, more motivated, more money, more whatever. Go see them and remember, this is where we're going. Every time we take a deceased, Shaykh, people say, oh, what time we taking him to the cemetery? I say, brother, brother, we're not taking him. They look at you like, what are you talking about? I said, he's taken us. He's taken us to remind us of where we're going. He's going to get buried, whether you like it or not, he's going to go to the cemetery. But he's taking all of us,

**[19:39]** the whole entourage that follows, he's taken us all to remind us, hey, take heed. You're next. I was amongst you once. I've had people rock up at janazes and they become the janaza two days later. Oh, you standing on my grave, do not be, do not be amazed by my state. Yeah. I was like you yesterday and you will be like me tomorrow. There's freaky stories, Shaykh, you know, of people who have actually witnessed their own grave. But they've been at janazes and we dig three, four graves at a time now because it's time. And they've actually come up and said to me, who's that grave for? I said,

**[19:57]** this is a grave. And two days later, I buried him. And I still remember the name to now. And I remember how he looked like. And I remember what jacket he had on. And these are things that subhanAllah never leave you. You know, there was a munshid, an Anasheed, uh, artist, uh, he did a song called Farshid Turab. Yes. Yeah. I did hear it.

**[20:12]** Yeah. Farshid Turab. He passed away from a car accident. Not long ago. Yeah. Yeah. So like that was one of the main, I think that was an Anasheed that was like a very powerful Anasheed moving people towards death and like, you know, and he was a young man. You know, my bed is dirt and there he was. And subhanAllah a few years later, he passed away in a car accident. He passed away and he became on a mattress of dirt. Allahu Akbar, Shaykh.

**[20:29]** We could talk about death all day, every day. And it's not a subject that you could get sick of. Yeah. Because it'll affect every single one of us. It'll touch every single family. And as soon as it does, and I noticed this every day is as soon as somebody's family member dies, he's straight away telling me, Ahmed, I need to, I need to come and help you. You know, I need to come closer back to Allah. It's good. It's good. It's good that this happens because it's waking people up. If you want to lose your appetite for life, you wash a dead body. There's no doubt.

**[20:46]** I mean, that's just like one of one should do enough. And especially someone that you knew, that you saw alive, you know, and that's something subhanAllah that before it was, you know, may Allah reward you all brothers and sisters who take on the job of washing the bodies. It used to be the community, like in my community, we had to find volunteers every time. When I was the Imam 20 years ago, in my community, we had to find people, volunteers to wash the bodies because we didn't have a Muslim funeral home. We didn't have a place to wash it. We would use different places. And like, I got to get four people with me. So we'd put out messages before WhatsApp, before anything,

**[21:03]** right? You got to send out messages. Can anyone come out and help us? You know, especially when someone didn't have family to wash this body. And you could see someone's complete appetite for dunya is gone once they wash a body. But I want to put something to you. You know, it always shocked me, the heartlessness of someone who doesn't have iman, but that's an undertaker. Like you walk in and these people are like cutting up bodies, like as if they're, it reminds me of like kids, like, like doing crafts, arts and crafts and like that. Like, they're just talking about like what they're going to have for lunch and what they're going to do for the day. They're laughing and they've got the most mortified bodies in front of them, just these

**[21:20]** images in front of them. Just like cutting the bodies, moving around. We're walking in there and we're just like taking it back. And they're just... SubhanAllah, you say that. And it's one of the things I tell people. My first experience in the coroner, went to pick up a dead body, was back then they say, yeah, just go grab them there. So I was a bit, you know, inquisitive when I was 18. So I would wander a little bit in the coroner's area. And I seen through the window, the body where it had the skin taken off, ripped back. And when you cut the body

**[21:36]** to hear the body drops, because we're held together. So I could see this body on a table where it was sagging. It was naked. And SubhanAllah, they weren't there. Nobody was in the room. It was tea time. They're in the room, laughing, eating, drinking. And I thought to myself, Allahu Akbar, this guy just ripped open a human body. And the bell rings, he's taking his gloves off, he's washed his hands, he's taken his mask off, the grinder gets turned off, and he's in the room eating. Allahu Akbar. Harder than rocks. But look, they're not Muslims, these people.

**[21:55]** But like, that's just like, that is the exact image of someone who's dead, but alive versus someone who's alive, but dead. Exactly, SubhanAllah. Like the difference between like the life of the heart and the life of the soul and to someone who's alive. You know, Shaykh, when I guess someone passed away who's kind of a unique character, someone who's been, for example, you know, like I had a man who his wife passed away. She was young, 48, 49. Then he passed away 45 days later, and they left five kids, two of them autistic, all under the age of 19. And when I went to pick

**[22:14]** him up from the hospital, and we went to the medical records area to put the paperwork in, the old lady, I said to her, you know what, I love telling him the stories while I'm waiting. I just buried his wife 45 days ago. Oh, that's sad. I said, you know, he's left five kids and he's just amazing. And she goes, yeah, yeah, you know, that's sad. They don't have no emotions. He had a good life. You know, someone's like 89 or 90 or something. Oh, yeah, he had a good innings. You know, he looked like he was a cricket game, you know. We had someone, the young man that

**[22:31]** passed away, horrible accident. The way that they were like, oh, you know, his brain was like in a bag, all of his insides were in a bag, and his body was like, it's like he was showing like a buffet at a restaurant. It was strange, strange. And that's like, may Allah protect us from dead hearts. And that's why Ibn al-Qayyim says, the death of the soul is worse than the death of the body. The death of the soul is worse than the death of the body. You know, you just said that now and I remember. When we have shootings and these kinds of crimes, they will always keep

**[22:48]** organs. So what we do, we make a deal with them is give us the body. We'll bury the organ in 10, 12 days when your investigation's done, just to speed up the process of burying the body. So they'll usually take the brain, other parts, but usually the brain is the main part because they say it takes up to two weeks for the nerves to settle, the neurons and all that, to show exactly the cause of death. This is what they say. When we go pick up the brain, it comes in a yellow box with like a skull like this on it, like dangerous. I go back to the cemetery and I usually

**[23:04]** dig back on top of the grave site. And it's usually young people who've been shot. And I grabbed that brain and I put it back into the hole. And when it's in my hands, I think to myself, Allahu Akbar, this was the CPU. This was the processing unit. This was the computer of this person on this earth that signaled everything he thought about, did, actions, moving arms, legs. I've got it in my hand. This is what we are as humans, nothing. And I put it in the grave and I bury it. But to the people I pick it up from, it's normal. Yeah, the brain's there, mate. Yeah, just going to grab it,

**[23:23]** see you later. And I'm like, they can't, no. I've never met the people who do the burials at the bukir in Medina. Yeah, I have. Yeah. They told you the process. So I just had the chance to talk to them a couple of years ago and they were mentioning how, you know, they basically come back, they reopen the grave after a year, they bunch the bones, put it into the side and then they reuse. And so that one grave fits like six, seven people. And obviously they're moving, they're dealing with a small piece of land, but they mentioned that sometimes they come back

**[23:38]** and the body's not decayed. So they come one year, two years. And if the body has not decayed, they don't touch the grave anymore. I know of people, I know of a relative of mine who was a Shaheed in Palestine, six years after they opened his grave and his body. He used to comb his hair backwards. It was still combed. Still combed. Still combed the same way, subhanAllah. Sayyidina, the qualities of a Shaheed.

**[23:55]** It's just crazy that no one, that a person who doesn't have iman, just dismisses all this stuff and says, ah, you know, like it is what it is, right? Like, may Allah give us hearts that are alive and souls that can perceive because that's where the difference is. It's sad, you know, because, you know, I remember once getting an old man and he had really no one around him except a couple of friends. They were old men too. These were the originators that came to Australia back in the 60s. So they spoke slang English like that. You'd see them as, you know, Lebanese, but they would speak so pure English. Hey, you got me? You know, like that kind of stuff.

**[24:14]** And when they came for his mate's funeral, as I was washing him, I said to him, you know, his soul now is going to connect back with him and it's this and that. And they looked at me like this, three of them. And I said, where'd you get that from? I said, it's in our teachings. We die, man. We just die and that's it. Our time's up. Some are lucky, some are unlucky with their deaths. I said, you guys have got one foot in the grave already. Look at yourselves. I said that to him. You're at the verge of death. Don't you like believe there's something else after this? Where's the trillions that have died?

**[24:31]** Ah, everyone's becomes bones, mate. And I thought it's exactly like the people of Quraysh. The only thing that's wasted is time for us. Everything else is just subhanAllah. And I thought, man, then you get the young guys who come up to you and go. You know, a 15 year old the other day at the cemetery tells me, brother Ahmed, I watched your videos. I said, good, good. Alhamdulillah. May Allah bless you. Are you learning? He goes, they make me ponder. I said, 15 years old, ponder. That's a big word.

**[24:48]** Like I didn't even know this word. What are you pondering about, my brother? This is at the cemetery. We just buried someone. He said, I ponder about my life and the purpose of my life and why I'm here. I said, Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah. This is what it's about. This is what the reminder of death is. It's not to scare anyone. We're not trying to scare people with death. We're trying to make people embrace it. Be ready for it. Yeah.

**[25:03]** Shaykh, I'm going to end with Gaza. I want to talk about a few things about Gaza. One of them was Ruh al-Ru'ay, Khal in the Pan, the soul of our soul. I don't think I'll ever, like I'm, yeah. Alhamdulillah. The morning I woke up and I saw on my feed that he died. Honestly, it felt like a relative death. I don't think I felt that pain. He messaged me on Facebook. Alhamdulillah. He messaged me on one of my videos and he said in Arabic to me, May Allah keep you steadfast and strong in what you do.

**[25:21]** And I thought, amazing. This guy just lost his granddaughter. He's sending me a message from Palestine. I'll never forget it, Shaykh. That's why we just sent him. I never got to meet him. He was one person I wanted to meet. But he actually messaged me. He was watching. May Allah make him among the martyrs. May Allah have mercy on him. When he passed away, come on.

**[25:37]** He still had that smile on his face. It wasn't a smile, it was a laugh. Have you ever seen anything like that? Yeah. It still resembles. I've seen people who resembles and I saw people, subhanAllah, that the people in Gaza are very lucky, but we are also lucky here too. We do have some blessings in our own communities. There are people still doing good things. You know, it don't feel bad that we're not there. There's a reason we're not there. Allah wants us exactly where we are. To do what we're doing, to spread the message.

**[25:54]** Allah wants us exactly where we are. To do what we're doing, to spread the message where we are. Their message is happening right in front of us. This is their message. When they say, you be patient. Don't tell us to be patient. You be patient. You came to my office yesterday. You met a young girl from Gaza. Missing limbs. And I saw how you responded. What is it about seeing the living people of Gaza?

**[26:10]** And one of the reasons, one of the things I wanted to convey with this series was that shuhada are taken care of by Allah. But those that are still with us, these are really our amanah. What is it when you see a person from Gaza whose life has been stolen, but they're still here? You know, Shaykh, we get a lot of people, their lives are stolen amongst us, but it's not the same. It wasn't the cut limbs, it wasn't the wheelchair. It was her attitude. It was her, it was her lease of life that made me cry yesterday. How she just seemed like nothing was wrong.

**[26:27]** She's come from, if we could get into that brain, and see the images that she's been through, what she's been through, being pulled out, almost dead. And she's happy. And she's singing, and she's smiling. I could see the adults sitting around her depressed, upset, saddened. Just any sadness. It's like the ones who the angels accompany them when they're in these spots of rubbles. You know, you hear of the ones that were trapped under rubbles.

**[26:42]** They tell you there was an angel keeping them company. As soon as the people found them, that third person disappeared, or the second person disappeared. She has the angels keeping her happy. She has the sakina of Allah. What made me cry was how she's an example for us. That whatever we're going through is nothing. This is our test. We wouldn't handle those tests.

**[26:57]** We're not made for those tests. The people of Gaza, not just are they, that Jibril, peace be upon him, in harnessed Syria with his wings, embraced it. The Prophet, peace be upon him, gave the beautiful glad tidings of the beautiful sham. There's something about those people. That when you see them, they're not like your average people. They're not average. They're not average.

**[27:12]** We meet average people every day. In fact, subhanAllah, she was mentioning that video of her being pulled out of the rubble. You know, she just saw it happen this evening on Facebook. A few months after. Just came across it. Imagine watching what looks like your own death. How did she react? She was smiling.

**[27:27]** It's not human. It's like, they're so inspiring, but it's so painful to watch them even as they're so inspiring. That's the problem. SubhanAllah, you want to cry when you're with them, but you also want to laugh so that you can give them some joy. You don't want to take away whatever moments of joy that they find. I have to hold myself when I'm with them

**[27:42]** and just kind of delay my breakdown until after they leave. Because I don't want to just break down in front of them constantly. Because they're holding it together. You don't want to be a part of chipping away. They'll probably say, what are you crying about? Even when you said to them, Irbik, you said, Forgive us, we wish we could have done more for you.

**[27:57]** That's what made me cry. She said, we know. They know, subhanAllah. They gave us a glimpse of the stories we heard of. What the prophets, people went through. Being exiled, still smiling together. The people of Ahlul-Hudud, the people that were Ahlul-Buruj,

**[28:12]** the people of all these calamities that came before us. And people held it. And we never believed, we believed those stories because we never seen it. Sometimes the heart and the eyes, they differ sometimes. But when you see this happening in front of you, It's a Ain Al-Yaqeen. In its own way, it's an eye of certainty.

**[28:27]** You see it and you believe it. You have to believe it. And then when you talk to these people, Amazing, you know, I've spoken to so many people from Gaza back in Australia. They're just laughing and smiling. And I think to myself, I'm so ashamed to be on this level with you guys. I'm ashamed to be wearing clothes that have a name on them.

**[28:42]** Or that are maybe a little bit more updated than yours. I actually feel ashamed. You people are worthy of so much. You're worthy of so much. That's why they'll be crowned by Allah. Allahu Akbar. We flying, instead of crushed under the rubble, they're flying under the throne of Allah.

**[28:57]** Instead of missing limbs, they have wings that can take them all over. Instead of being deprived of food, they're eating their lunch every day from the gardens of Jannah. Wa Shuhada wa Inda Rabb. And more than that, they're with Allah. I want to ask you this question. I always think about it.

**[29:12]** The life of the average Muslim believer who dies in a Barzakh, we know it. We know parts of it. But the Shaheed in the Barzakh, does he have a Barzakh? Or his Barzakh is just flying around the Jannah? All of them are in the Barzakh right now. But his experience in the Barzakh is completely different from us.

**[29:27]** The way that Ibn Qayyim rahimahullah mentions is that the believers are also in the bodies of birds, but they nestle under the trees of Jannah. Whereas the Shuhada nestle under the throne of Allah. The chandeliers under the throne of Allah. So they have more expanse.

**[29:42]** They have more access. They have more range. They have better bodies. I can't comprehend it. May Allah count us amongst the Shuhada. Ameen. We should all ask for Shuhada. Take me as a Shaheed, Wallah. But take me when you're pleased with me.

**[29:57]** Take me when I'm worthy of that. And keep me doing as much good as I can, till I can't do it anymore. You live for Allah and you die for Allah. That's all our purpose is. And you operate on his time. But the Prophet said that a person who is sincere in their intention for Shuhada could even be a Shaheed if they die in their bed.

**[30:12]** SubhanAllah. You have that Niyah to be witnesses for Allah and then to witness Allah. And we ask Allah to allow us all to be Shuhada. Ameen. We ask Allah to forgive us for our shortcomings in regards to our brothers and sisters. We ask Allah to unite us with the souls of the Prophet.

**[30:27]** The righteous ones. And to count us amongst those that he's pleased with. And we ask Allah to widen our graves and to allow us to bathe in the rivers of Al-Jannah and to be sustained from the sustenance of Al-Jannah. Ameen. JazakAllah khair. It's such a pleasure to have you, Shaykh.

**[30:42]** I love you, Shaykh. I thought you should have been a basketball player. You know what? Maybe on the other side. I'm gonna be a tall person too, inshallah. We said this, you know, like in Jannah. In Jannah, bi-idhnillah ta'ala. We're all the same size. Same age, same size. We have a beautiful Mukri.

**[30:57]** I get your muscles, you get my height. We have a beautiful Mukri. He's always goes to me. And he's a beautiful... I've known him since he came. I told Shaykh, in Jannah, I'm gonna have a better voice than you. He goes, I'm gonna have a better voice than now. And I'm like, man, when's it gonna end? May Allah ta'ala let us walk through Jannah first.

**[31:12]** Ameen. And we all reunite with the same gathering but in that place. Ameen. Where you don't have a schedule, heavy schedule. I don't have jet lag. Nobody's busy. There are so many brothers out there. I want to spend time with them.

**[31:27]** But everybody is, you know, the world. Swim or drown. You know, we don't have a lot of time to sit. I think that's one of the things, SubhanAllah, is like, one of my teachers, when he was talking about Al-Hakam and Takafir, he had a beautiful reflection. He said that, life is distracting you also in the sense that

**[31:42]** the temporary pleasures of this life are getting in the way of the real pleasures that you should be seeking. If I have the companionship of the Prophet, peace be upon him, and these righteous people, what do I want with the companionship of this life? If I have that home, what do I want with this home? So it's also another thing that these things are serving as barriers to where

**[31:57]** Alhamdulillah, Shaykh, I'm at a stage where none of the worldly matters even matters to me. Apart from a little bit of comfort, if you can get it and choose it, then yeah, why not? But, you know, like they said, if you have the means, then why not? Just don't be

**[32:12]** wisely and don't be over-exaggerating. But I find my sakinah now, my tranquility, comes from the remembrance of Allah. From knowing if I can get up, I've got the Adhkar to do. I'm going to do a bit of Maraja today. I can't wait to get

**[32:27]** to the next Surah. I can't wait to finish this Hadith. There's so much to do out there, and I think to myself, inshallah I get to do it. This is what I find pleasuring. Before, the worldly stuff was a whole different outlook.

**[32:42]** The worldly stuff was get up, have your meals, go to the gym, train, meet with this guy, meet with that guy. It's just a whole different thing now. It's still the last things on my mind. There's a difference between what you have to get done and what you actually

**[32:57]** look forward to doing and what you see as your purpose in life. There are priorities, there's purpose, and then there are things that you need to get done. So you still got to go to the gym, still got to work out. I enjoy the gym. I enjoy it because that one hour in the gym is the time where

**[33:12]** I get to be myself. Get to be by myself. And I actually, I was telling the boys before, I've gone into this habit and it's come over years. When I do sets and reps, I count to speed. It doesn't

**[33:27]** go. It's like, just count one, two, three. It's like subhanAllah, walhamdulillah. And when I get to Allahu Akbar and I've got to five, then I repeat it again. Then I've done ten. Anything after that is a bonus. And this is how I calculate it.

**[33:42]** Yeah, well, you know, when I look, I think to myself, you know, those training sessions or my cardio sessions are the best time I actually get to reflect and ponder and listen to some of your lessons and the barzakh, listen to it. Last time when I was doing cardio because I was in a peaceful moment,

**[33:57]** I get to give back. You know, I like every second on this earth to be used in a positive way. Not to sit there. I can't sit in a cafe. I've never sat in cafes or watched TV for nothing. وَابْتَغِ فِيمَا آتَاكَ اللَّهُ الدَّارَ الْآخِرَةَ وَلَا تَنسَ نَصِيبَكَ مِنَ الدُّنْيَا

**[34:17]** Seek with what Allah has given you. The home of the hereafter. And don't forget your share in this world. Don't forget. You're still, like you said, you're still in this world. You know, I've got grandkids. I've still, I've got two grandkids. Inshallah. I'll show you some photos.

**[34:32]** We'll get it off the camera. And we've got you know, the kids are growing old. I got married young. And I'm finding, you know, subhanAllah, being through sicknesses, through kidney transplant, you know, that was probably the darkest times of my life. That was probably

**[34:47]** where, you know, at 14 I went to Pakistan to become a hafiz. And, you know, there was always the roots there of the religion in me. But knowing Quran and applying Quran

**[35:02]** are two different things. You know, knowing a surah, you know, just by words compared to when they're reading it, your heart is yes, it connects to it. Feels it. Knows the story as it's reading.

**[35:17]** Are two different things. And that's where I am now. In my life where I'm actually feeling every single thing that happens. When I bury that dead and put him on his right side and take the straps off, and even to the straps people will ask, why?

**[35:32]** I said, it's dignity. The body will expand. And face the right side and people and making sure he's perfectly lined up and everything is done right. It's all serenity to me. It's all tranquility. It's all

**[35:47]** I love it. Jumping out of that grave going, I am the last person to touch this person. And the dirt starts falling on you. And you know the part that got me the most, shaykh, was you know, when three

**[36:02]** handfuls of dirt or three throws towards the head. I think to myself, okay, we understand from it we are created. To it we shall return the dirt. And from it we shall be resurrected, right? Then I thought further

**[36:17]** to myself, the Prophet ﷺ said this for a reason. Ponder. Because if I was to throw dirt on my mum, my dad, on you, on a friend, on anyone, it's disrespectful, right? Throwing dirt

**[36:32]** on someone is disrespectful. You're throwing it on your most loved person in the grave. You're throwing dirt, right? It's throwing dirt. And it happens in all religions. They all do it. All the other faiths do the dirt.

**[36:47]** Most of them, the Catholics, the Christians. But when you've got that bit of dirt left on your hands, it doesn't all cling. And you do this and you think, wow, it's still on me. It doesn't want to leave me.

**[37:02]** When you get home, I'll never forget the dirt from my mother's grave still on my shoes when I got home. I know. How am I going to wash this? You don't want to wash it. No.

**[37:17]** But you had the honour of burying your mum. It's something you'll never forget. And that is something I try to apply with every deceased sibling. Please. Please come down. Please. A lot of them don't. I say,

**[37:32]** please try. You will never regret it. Time will pass and it will be something you will never... You get one mum and one dad. Well, I give everyone good relationships with their parents. Have mercy on our deceased parents.

**[37:47]** Keep us close to our loved ones. Ameen. And when you're seeing the ages now passing away, the 70s, we're next. We're in line. Like that generation moves, another one comes in.

**[38:02]** We move if we live that full life of Muhammad 60 to 70, if you get this kind of life. So we're running out of time. Time is eroding. Every day we move closer to that date of death.

**[38:17]** To that date when I always... This is my thought, Shaykh, always that if today was my date of death and the angels have got my shroud and my perfume from Jannah and they descending down for

**[38:32]** me to be at the place where I'm meant to be. Like, you do not know this. A normal person doesn't think this. But I think it every day. Will this be the place I'm going to at my place of death?

**[38:47]** Allah o ala. That's fair. That should be the last word. May Allah bless you. May Allah give you and us all a good ending. And a better place

**[39:02]** in the hereafter than the one that we have here. May Allah bless you. JazakAllah khair. I don't like to see you too, Tosha. Allah berek fi. Allah berek fi. JazakAllah khair. JazakAllah khair.

## Other Episodes in "The Other Side | Barzakh and Beyond"
- [SERIES FINALE: It’s Not the End | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 30](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/the-greatest-deed-is-hope-in-allah-the-other-side.md)
- [Everyone Will Have Regrets | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 29](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/everyone-will-have-regrets-the-other-side.md)
- [Your Tahajjud Just Earned You Jannah | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 28](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/your-tahajjud-just-earned-you-jannah-the-other-side.md)
- [Laylatul Qadr in the Heavens and the Graves | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 27](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/layalatul-qadr-in-the-heavens-and-the-graves-the-other-side.md)
- [Your Duas Can Change The Worlds  | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 26](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/your-duas-can-change-the-worlds-the-other-side.md)
- [People From a Past Life | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 25](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/people-from-a-past-life-the-other-side.md)
- [Best Friends Forever | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 24](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/best-friends-forever-the-other-side.md)
- [Your Loved Ones Never Left You | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 23](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/your-loved-ones-never-left-you-the-other-side.md)
- [Why Allah prescribes you Bitter Medicine | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 22](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/when-allah-prescribes-you-bitter-medicine-the-other-side.md)
- [The Most Important Prayer of Your Life | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 21](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/the-most-important-prayer-of-your-life-the-other-side.md)
- [When The Qur’an Arrives in Your Grave | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 20](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/the-quran-in-your-head-or-crushing-it-the-other-side.md)
- [The Many Forms of Zina | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 19](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/the-many-forms-of-zina-the-other-side.md)
- ["You Owe Me." Free Yourself from Riba and Debt | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 18](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/the-chains-of-riba-and-debt-the-other-side.md)
- [Was it that big of a deal? Your Wudu is Serious | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 17](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/your-wudu-is-a-big-deal-the-other-side.md)
- [Watch Your Mouth | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 16](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/watch-your-mouth-the-other-side.md)
- [We Will Not Fix What You Have Ruined | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 15](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/we-will-not-fix-what-you-have-ruined-the-other-side.md)
- [Deeds that Save you from Punishment of the Grave | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 14](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/the-one-deed-that-saved-you-the-other-side.md)
- [Did Allah Put You On This List? | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 13](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/did-allah-put-you-on-this-list-the-other-side.md)
- [Now You Can Fly | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 12](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/now-you-can-fly-the-other-side.md)
- [How to Have a Bigger Grave | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 11](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/how-to-have-a-bigger-grave-the-other-side.md)
- [What About The Innocent Children? | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 10](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/what-about-the-innocent-children-the-other-side.md)
- [When You Meet The Souls of Gaza | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 9](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/divine-justice-is-already-happening-the-other-side.md)
- [What it Feels Like to Die | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 8](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/what-it-feels-like-to-die-the-other-side.md)
- [How Many Lives Do You Really Have? | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 7](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/how-many-lives-do-you-really-have-the-other-side.md)
- [Is Allah Speaking to You ? | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 6](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/can-you-see-allah-in-a-dream-the-other-side.md)
- [How to See the Prophet ﷺ in a Dream | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 5](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/how-to-see-the-prophet-in-a-dream-the-other-side.md)
- [What Do My Dreams Really Mean? | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 4](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/what-do-my-dreams-really-mean-the-other-side.md)
- [They May Have Another Name For You | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 3](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/your-name-in-the-heavens-the-other-side.md)
- [They Know About Your World | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 2](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/theyre-watching-your-world-the-other-side.md)
- [The Dead Are Alive in Their Graves | The Other Side: Barzakh and Beyond Ep. 1](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/the-dead-are-alive-in-their-graves-the-other-side.md)
- [Trailer: The Other Side | Barzakh and Beyond | Ramadan Series 2025](https://yaqeeninstitute.org/watch/series/the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond/trailer-the-other-side-barzakh-and-beyond-ramadan-series-2025.md)